These days, many people watch sports on TV. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
Although
advertising products
by popular sportsmen is thought by some to be a good aspect, other people
think that it can be detrimental. In my opinion, I believe that advertising different products
can bring more advantages for people
and companies compared to any problems it may bring.
Despite the drawbacks below, I consider benefits
which are brought by advertising might be really useful. Correct article usage
the benefits
Firstly
, companies can rely on athletes’ popularity in order to promote their product
. Fix the agreement mistake
products
For example
, the chance that customers will be interested in new sneakers which are produced by Nike is higher if Micheal Jordan considers them interesting. Secondly
, there are some people
who do not care about new products
at all. In other words
, they may not know about new goods, while
they are
do not mind Unnecessary verb
apply
to buy
something which they noticed in their Change the verb form
buying
favorite
player’s t-shirt.
Admittedly, there are some issues involved when Change the spelling
favourite
products
are advertised by famous athletes. One problem is that it may increase prices, meanwhile the quality is the same. For instance
, the sneaker company can pay several millions
Tiger Wolf to advertise their sneakers which may lead to a significant marketing cost increase and, Change to singular
million
as a result
, higher prices. Another negative aspect is that it may be wrongly thought that the product has outstanding quality just because it is promoted by celebrity
. In fact, Add an article
a celebrity
this
is not always true.
In conclusion, the significant benefits that companies and common people
can get when famous athletes advertise different products
clearly outweigh any disadvantages.Submitted by s_syedy on
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Task Achievement
Consider introducing more specific examples that directly support your main points to strengthen your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
Aim to vary your sentence structures and use transitional phrases to improve flow between ideas for better coherence and cohesion.
Task Achievement
To enhance clarity, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea, supported by relevant examples or explanations.
Task Achievement
Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame your argument, showing a clear position throughout the essay.
Task Achievement
Good job on presenting a balanced view by discussing both advantages and disadvantages before stating your opinion.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have a clear logical structure, making your essay easy to follow.