Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. Do you agree or disagree?
In the present world, governments’ investment is rapidly increasing. Many individuals like the different investments of their governments in the arts. It is disagreed that the government must invest
this
money in public services instead
. Cities without theatres, concert halls and art
galleries cannot teach their citizens about cultures, human behaviours, and enjoyment of life.
Firstly
, a citizen would increase their intellectuality if their cities had art
events
. For example
, it is known that theatres are used to teach traditions, history, and human actions to individuals from seven to seventy ages old and especially it can be helpful to teenagers and elementary school kids’ development. However
, if a metropolis does not have art
events
, the community will only learn what they need to know like a robot and they will lack emotions. As a result
, arts in cities have significant benefits for individuals.
Secondly
, people can reduce their stress and depression with art
festivals. For instance
, with technological development most folk deal with pressure in their daily lives and thanks to investing in art
, people can enjoy their lives and feel like they are alive even if they are exhausted. On the other hand
, if there are fewer or no art
events
in the center
, people need to go to psychology to treat themselves. Change the spelling
centre
Therefore
, this
makes it clear that government should invest in the arts.
In conclusion, downtowns with no art
events
are duller and more chaotic than metropolises with art
festivals. Thus
, the idea of investing only in public services cannot be accepted. After the given information, it is predicted that governments invest more money in art
festivals such
as music, theatre, and cultural things to help people’s mental illnesses and educate themSubmitted by atakantemizkan0 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
introduction
Your introduction provides a clear thesis statement, but you could enhance its impact by offering a brief preview of your supporting arguments.
body
Develop your main points further with more specific examples or data for even stronger argumentation.
coherence
Consider varying your sentence structures and transitions more to enhance the flow and coherence of your essay.
conclusion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your arguments, but adding a more decisive statement about your stance could strengthen your position.
paragraph development
Ensure all paragraphs are well-developed and centered around a single main idea, using clear topic sentences.
argument strength
You effectively argue against the notion that government investment in the arts is a waste, presenting clear benefits regarding cultural education and mental health.
relevance
You consistently link the importance of government investment in the arts to broader societal benefits, like stress reduction and intellectual development.
example usage
You use a variety of examples to support your points, though more specificity could further enhance these illustrations.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS
Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!