Challenge 4 : In some countries, companies allow people to work from home. In others, people are still expected to work in an office. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

There is no denying the fact that various world regions have agencies that authorize employees to
work
from home or place
work
.
While
it is a commonly held belief that companies allow individuals to
work
remotely. There is
also
an argument that employment is supposed to
work
at the office.
This
essay will analyze
this
topic from both points of view and express my opinion. On one hand, working from home is an efficient method to reduce traffic and air pollution.
In other words
, the number of cars and other public transportation will increase significantly,
following
this
the exotic carbon will plunge.
In addition
, making people
work
from their homes is crucial to
increase
Wrong verb form
increasing
show examples
creativity by creating personal space with no limits.
For example
, China and Japan have applied
this
idea to their citizen and it is clear to see the immense development in these countries compared to others.
On the other hand
, there is a variety of jobs
require
Correct pronoun usage
that require
show examples
their employment to
work
in the field. It is
also
possible to say that some sectors
such
as medical and military can not
work
remotely.
Moreover
, Working from the office has various benefits
such
as creating a daily routine for throws they do not have numerous activities
also
reduces several medical issues like anxiety.
For instance
, a study published in 2002 by the University of Oxford showed a critical impact on production compared to others who are working remotely. In conclusion, there are no easy answers to
this
question. In balance,
however
, I tend to believe that working from home is more convenient and has a vital role in increasing talent and
this
will reflect
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
the development of the country.
Submitted by zaidamrat5 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence and Cohesion
To further improve, ensure to maintain a clear and logical progression of ideas throughout your essay. This could be enhanced by using a wider range of linking phrases to connect ideas more smoothly, making your arguments clearer to the reader.
Task Achievement
While you have presented your arguments well, providing more detailed and specific examples to support your points could strengthen your essay. Consider incorporating more in-depth analysis or case studies to illustrate your points more vividly.
Introduction and Conclusion
You've done an excellent job introducing and concluding your essay, providing a clear overview of your stance and summarizing your points effectively at the end.
Task Coverage
Your essay does a commendable job discussing both sides of the argument, which demonstrates a good understanding of the task requirement.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: