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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The line graph gives information about the number of Iranian, Greek and Turkish students who enrolled at Sheffield University between 2005 and 2009.

The line graph gives information about the number of Iranian, Greek and Turkish students who enrolled at Sheffield University between 2005 and 2009.
#line #information #iranian #greek #turkish #students #sheffield #university
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The line graph illustrates
Use synonyms
number
Add an article
a number
the number
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
student
Change to a plural noun
students
show examples
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
 three countries belonging
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 Sheffield University between 2005 and 2009.
Increasing
Add an article
An increasing
The increasing
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number
Use synonyms
 of students are Turkish and Iranian ;throughout
four-years
Correct your spelling
four years
show examples
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 Sheffield University ,
whaile
Correct your spelling
which
decrease
Wrong verb form
decreased
show examples
 to a
thrid
Correct your spelling
third
show examples
 count of
Greece
Correct your spelling
Greek
show examples
Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
. Shown line graph is Irainan individuals in 2005 about 20
Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
comparison
Replace the word
compared
show examples
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 2009 ;
therefore
Linking Words
 their
number
Use synonyms
 reached 120.
Linking Words
Subsequently
Add a comma
Subsequently,
show examples
 raise
number
Use synonyms
 with Progress in years. Turkish
Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 in 2005 ,was
number
Use synonyms
 about 40 double of Iranian. In 2005 Greece
student
Use synonyms
 about 180 almost
Three-Double
Correct your spelling
Three
show examples
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
 countries, but in 2009
to retreat
Verb problem
,
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 40 same
number
Use synonyms
Turkish
Change preposition
as Turkish
show examples
 in 2004.
Submitted by saad.444221 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words number, student with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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