Conducting sports events such as Olympics or World cup encourage people to live healthy. While some people indicate that there are various other methods to remain healthy. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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this

Linking Words

modern

world

Use synonyms

, popular

sports

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events

Use synonyms

could influence

people

Use synonyms

become

Add the particle

to become

show examples

more aware

to remain

Change preposition

of remaining

show examples

healthy. Even though,

another ways

Replace the adjective

another way

other ways

show examples

also

Linking Words

may give benefits to make

people

Use synonyms

healthier. Both of these methods will be outlined before reaching my opinion.

To begin

Linking Words

with, many

events

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such

Linking Words

Olympics

Correct article usage

the Olympics

show examples

and

World

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Cup

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

known worldwide. It is impossible that

people

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didn't

Wrong verb form

don't

show examples

know about it. Hosting the

World

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Class competition in our own country would be benefit.

Thus

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

events

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may influence society

arround

Correct your spelling

around

the

world

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

, the

participations

Fix the agreement mistake

participation

show examples

of young

people

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in many football stadiums could increase dramatically

due to

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the

participate

Replace the word

participation

show examples

of their idols in

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Add an article

the world

show examples

world cup

Correct your spelling

World Cup

show examples

However

Linking Words

sports

Use synonyms

events

Use synonyms

only

Add a missing verb

are only

show examples

established once time in many years. For that

reasons

Fix the agreement mistake

reason

show examples

Use synonyms

people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

health could be improved even without waiting for these

events

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Moreover

Linking Words

, personal

healthy

Replace the word

health

show examples

is depend

Wrong verb form

depends

show examples

Use synonyms

people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

own decisions. Some

people

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believe that

another ways

Replace the adjective

another way

other ways

show examples

can encourage

people

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to be healthier. First of all,

healthy

Correct article usage

the healthy

show examples

diet movement

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

been

trend

Add an article

a trend

show examples

worldwide, especially for women to reduce obesity

also

Linking Words

many diseases. Daily workouts can

also

Linking Words

become

Correct article usage

a preferences

show examples

preferences

Fix the agreement mistake

preference

show examples

, especially for men as it could make

men

Change noun form

men's

show examples

body

Fix the agreement mistake

bodies

show examples

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

strongest

Correct article usage

the strongest

show examples

muscles.

Besides

Linking Words

manage

Wrong verb form

managing

show examples

the time to sleep is crucial for

make

Change the verb form

making

show examples

body

Correct article usage

the body

show examples

still in

well

Change the adverb

good

show examples

condition. Eventually, many ways

Change the verb form

are

show examples

able to keep society still in good conditions

To conclude

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

can collaborate both of these methods to remain healthy. I would recommend that some

sports

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activities should become habitual

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

so that

people

Use synonyms

don't need to

waiting

Change the verb

wait

show examples

for some

sports

Use synonyms

event to keep their body healthier

patricius.yohanesWed May 01 2024

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sentence structure

Consider using a variety of sentence structures to enhance fluency and coherence. Repetitive structures can make the text feel monotonous.

grammar agreement tenses

Be mindful of agreement and tenses throughout your essay for clearer expression. For example, 'sports events could influence people become more aware' could be revised to 'sports events could influence people to become more aware,' improving clarity.

argument development

Try to develop your examples further to solidify your argument. Specific, detailed examples can greatly strengthen your case and make your essay more convincing.

perspective clarity

Maintain a consistent and clear perspective throughout your essay. While discussing both views, ensure that your own opinion is distinct and well-supported by the end of the essay.

balanced view

You presented a balanced view on the impact of sporting events versus other health practices, which is commendable for addressing the task.

effective conclusion

The conclusion effectively summarized the main points and stated your opinion, guiding the reader to a clear understanding of your stance.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
35
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

253 words

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Conducting sports events such as Olympics or World cup encourage people to live healthy. While some people indicate that there are various other methods to remain healthy. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some feel that governments should prioritize healthcare instead of other important areas. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays many people prefer to shop in supermarkets rather than small shops or local markets. Is this positive or negative development? Discuss and give your opinion.

Some people believe that handwriting is no longer useful in the modern world and should not be taught in schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some experts believe that when a country is already rich, any additional increase in economic wealth does not make its citizens any more satisfied. To what extent do you agree or disagree?