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Band 7.5

Some people think that the amount of money spent on library is a waste as a new technologies are developing and replacing library functions. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #amount #money #library #waste #technologies #functions
In a developing society, people tend to believe in
technologies
 rather than old sources of
places
 which used to be crowded as
libraries
.
On the other hand
, we still assume that the best preservation of ancient books will be in
libraries
 over generations. From my point of view
technologies
 which are not capable enough to substitute
libraries
, can not replace them. It is still known that robots can not replace a person as technology can not substitute an ancient book. We are human beings and we rely on
technologies
 as food that we cannot imagine our lives without. These are the greatest options that are provided by the developing modern world. Many inventions that were unachievable
due to
 changing times are becoming more accessible. Students, children, and people despite their positions in the hierarchy easily have connections to the variety of breakthrough inventions. It makes the world all connected in one big source and the name of it is the Internet. Countries can basically switch to the digitalized era and
instead
 of using their money on maintaining
libraries
, they can solve other community's problems.
On the contrary
 side,
libraries
 have always been
places
 where the public gathered and sought questions and answers. The place combines historical information and artefacts that are valuable all around the world. Keeping
libraries
 in good condition is challenging work and requires sustainable conditions and financial resources.
Furthermore
,
technologies
 are not developed enough to bring us from reality to an artificial environment. You can almost travel back through centuries and still be in touch with it.
Libraries
 are precious
places
 and worth visiting enough , we can not forget the cultural aspects that these
places
 save. In conclusion,
libraries
 which are digitalized and economically more advantageous compared to physical ones, have some valuable historical importance.
Submitted by kooper507 on

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Task Achievement
Remember to clearly state your position in the introduction and restate it in the conclusion to make your argument more persuasive.
Coherence & Cohesion
Try to use a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas more smoothly and make your essay more coherent.
Task Achievement
Include more specific examples to support your argument. This will help to make your essay more convincing and increase task achievement.
Language Use
You have effectively used a variety of sentences and vocabulary to express your ideas.
Task Achievement
You clearly outlined your views, providing a balanced discussion on the importance of libraries versus technology.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • digital infrastructure
  • eBooks
  • online journals
  • educational platforms
  • deep reading
  • screen time
  • cultural heritage
  • printed materials
  • balanced approach
  • unique value
  • community centers
  • free access
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