In many cities, planners tend to arrange shops, schools, offices and homes in specific areas and separate them from each other. do you think the advantages of this policy outweigh the disadvantages?

Architects are planning to build shops, schools, offices and homes in special
places
separately, in many cities. Basically, building constructions in the same
places
could not be a good solution, and it might be more stressful and strange for human beings
,
Remove the comma
apply
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because people adapt to travel and see different
places
.
For instance
, tourists come to popular cities to see different buildings and historical
places
, so they are located in
separated
Replace the word
separate
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areas, and
this
is more interesting and preferable to choose.
However
, if we imagine that kind of city where all buildings are constructed in different areas,
this
one
also
could be useful, because finding somewhere is one of the common
problem
Change to a plural noun
problems
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, and people
loose
Replace the word
lose
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their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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so much time to get there. So, if there
would be
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
that kind of utopian place, people would not spend their time to find. In conclusion, constructing buildings in separate areas is considered to be good.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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Task Achievement
Focus more on directly addressing the question asked, examining both advantages and disadvantages before concluding which outweighs the other.
Task Achievement
Make sure to develop your points more fully, providing specific examples to support your ideas.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on the logical structure of your essay, ensuring ideas flow smoothly from one paragraph to the next, with clear introductions and conclusions for each point.
Coherence & Cohesion
Use a range of connecting words to show relationships between ideas more clearly, enhancing the cohesion of your text.
Task Achievement
The essay initiates an attempt to explore the topic, recognising the significance of urban planning.
Coherence & Cohesion
Some effort to construct a logical argument, with an introduction and conclusion provided.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Segregation
  • Urban areas
  • Residential
  • Commercial
  • Industrial
  • Systematic development
  • Amenity provision
  • Urban management
  • Pollution
  • Quality of life
  • Transportation costs
  • Environmental impact
  • Social segregation
  • Amenities
  • Services
  • Income neighborhoods
  • Vibrant
  • Accessible
  • Travel times
  • Social interaction
  • Mixed-use developments
  • Sustainable urban planning
  • Walking
  • Cycling
  • Public transport
  • Urban sprawl
  • Green spaces
  • Agricultural land
  • Biodiversity
  • Business hubs
  • Investments
  • Employment opportunities
  • Economic growth
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