Nowadays, as a part of the educational process, students work at a company for a short period of time without pay. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

nowadays, many
of
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apply
show examples
students do
on
Correct your spelling
on-the-job
show examples
job
training at the
company
for
short
Add an article
the short
show examples
term without salary. in
this
essay will
elaborte
Correct your spelling
elaborate
the drawbacks and
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
.
Despite
Correct pronoun usage
Despite this
show examples
, I believe the advantages will dominate the disadvantages. On the one hand, the young people who join the
company
for internship will have the experience
how
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of how
show examples
to
work
on the right path.
This
is because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
They can face the real
worklife
Correct your spelling
work life
work-life
and when they find
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
problem they can find the solution or do
some
Correct determiner usage
a
show examples
discussion with
the
Change the word
their
show examples
senior workmate
how
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on how
show examples
to solve or
takcle
Correct your spelling
tackle
the issue.
this
means that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
this
priceless experience will lead them to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
success when they want to apply for
job
Add an article
a job
the job
show examples
.
Moreover
, when
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teenager
Fix the agreement mistake
teenagers
show examples
join
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
company
for
short
Add an article
a short
show examples
period, they will know they must study hard.
the
Capitalize word
The
show examples
reason is they will face the real situation and enter the professional field. they must develop their skill and give their time and focus to get a better
job
in the future.
on the other hand
, the drawbacks when
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
students get
internship
Fix the agreement mistake
internships
show examples
are they will not have enough time
for
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to
show examples
study.
this
is because they will
busy
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be busy
show examples
and will get tired when
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
back from
work
.
for example
, my friend
work
Change the verb form
works
show examples
at
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
retail
company
in my hometown.
at
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In
show examples
the final semester, we know that he
not
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does not
did not
show examples
fulfil the test because he
really
Add a missing verb
was really
show examples
tired when he
must
Wrong verb form
had to
show examples
work
for 5 hours/
day
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per day
show examples
after school.
moreover
Add a comma
moreover,
show examples
when he back home he just
take
Change the verb form
takes
show examples
a rest and never
study
Replace the word
studies
show examples
or do the homework.
this
is the reason
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
why he
fail
Change the form of the verb
failed
show examples
the exam. all in all, despite there are the disadvantages when the student
get
Change the verb form
gets
show examples
a
job
and
not
Add a missing verb
does not
show examples
get paid,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
believe the advantages will outweigh the drawbacks.
Submitted by rifkiw1205 on

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Grammar
Ensure consistency in verb tenses throughout your essay to maintain clarity.
Structure
Work on structure to make paragraphs clear and concise, ensuring each one deals with a single idea effectively.
Sentence Structure
Use a variety of sentence structures to enhance readability and engagement.
Proofreading
Remember to proofread your essay to correct any typos or minor errors.
Content
Try to introduce more specific examples to support your arguments, enhancing the persuasive power of your essay.
Balanced Argument
You effectively highlighted both advantages and disadvantages, maintaining a balance in your discussion.
Conclusion
Your conclusion neatly summarized your viewpoints, reinforcing your stance on the topic.
Logical Flow
The essay provides a logical flow of ideas, making it easy to follow your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • internship
  • practical experience
  • networking
  • soft skills
  • hard skills
  • career aspirations
  • resume
  • job market
  • work ethic
  • professionalism
  • exploitation
  • financial strain
  • inequality
  • educational value
  • work setting
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