In many modern societies grandchildren rarely spend any quality time with their grandparents. What do you think are consequences of this?

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Nowadays in
this
modern world
parents
prefer to move out of their
home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
show examples
after getting married. Because of that grandchildren have less
time
to spend with their
grandparents
. There are a myriad of results of it, especially negative effects.
Firstly
, to give an example
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
the reasons, why there is less
time
for kids to spend with their family members who are older, because
currently
Add a comma
currently,
show examples
both
parents
are working far away from
grandparents
Change noun form
grandparents'
grandparent's
show examples
house, so they cannot get an opportunity to be with the elder people in their family. Another purpose of less
time
to spend with
grandparents
might be the parent's ego.
This
is life and it can occur anything,
such
as misunderstanding between
parents
and
parents
-in-law. Because of
this
kind of
misunderstandings
Fix the agreement mistake
misunderstanding
show examples
usually
parents
move out to some different place, where there is no chance for kids to spend
time
with their
grandparents
. When it comes to the consequences of
this
trend, mainly and
firstly
, teenager are
loosing
Correct your spelling
losing
show examples
their valuable
time
which can be spent with
grandparents
. After
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
years they will die out and at that
time
adolescence
would
Wrong verb form
will
show examples
regret
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
not
be
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
with them.
For example
, when
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
was
child
Correct article usage
a child
show examples
, my granny used to live with us until her death date. I don't remember the
time
that
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
worried about my
parents
,
due to
the fact my grandma was always with us and there
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
no
time
to worry. She was good at culinary and always made us happy with her delicious dishes.
Grandparents
are the main source of history
or
Correct word choice
and
show examples
other things.
Also
,
time
with them
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
show examples
the
Correct pronoun usage
them the
show examples
chance to learn about their culture and their family. Most important they learn to respect the older people in
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
and how to behave with them. In conclusion,
currently
Add a comma
currently,
show examples
parents
are busy and
inhabiting
Verb problem
living
show examples
far from their family m which can be
main
Change the article
the main
show examples
purpose
to spend
Change preposition
for spending
show examples
less
time
with the elder members of
family
Add an article
the family
a family
show examples
. Because of
that
Add a comma
that,
show examples
they would lose
the the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
valuable
adolescence
Replace the word
adolescent
show examples
time
, family values and even family culture in the future.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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Language Use
Pay attention to punctuation and grammatical accuracy to improve clarity and professionalism.
Task Achievement
You've effectively addressed the topic and its implied questions, showing a good understanding of the task.
Coherence and Cohesion
You've shown capable reasoning in linking less family time with potential negative outcomes, which aligns well with the essay's requirements.

Your opinion

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