In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not build new homes there. What is your opinion about this?

#places #homes #space #countryside #people

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Nowadays, most nations have problems with land around the

city

Use synonyms

because they are looking for a place to build

apartments

Use synonyms

. Some say that we do not need to build

apartments

Use synonyms

in the countryside to protect nature. Personally, I do not agree with

this

Linking Words

idea, and in

this

Linking Words

essay, I will support my opinion with examples. Every country must prepare roads, public transportation, workplaces etc. to extend cities through their own land. First of all, if we do not construct buildings outside of the

city

Use synonyms

, it could be the main reason for many issues

such

Linking Words

as a traffic jam, air pollution, and price increases for

apartments

Use synonyms

and land.

For example

Linking Words

, half the population of Mongolia, live in the capital

city

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of Ulaanbaatar.

Therefore

Linking Words

, the issues that I mentioned, are going worse than ever for the

last

Linking Words

couple of years. People who live in Ulaanbaatar, spend three to five hours in traffic every day even though it is the smallest capital in Asia

according to

Linking Words

The Statistic Institute of Mongolia.

On the other hand

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, it is difficult to protect nature if the population increases there because of rubbish and industrialization. The rubbish is totally based on the population. A regular lifestyle of people creates lots of plastic bags and other rubbish. A person generates around 3 tonnes of waste in a year

according to

Linking Words

the National Waste Report of Australia in 2023. In conclusion, every country has its own plan to build suites and homes for the coming years.

However

Linking Words

, building

apartments

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or new homes outside of the

city

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or countryside increases the number of workplaces and decreases air pollution and traffic jams.

Submitted by enkhbat0923 on Thu May 02 2024

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Task Achievement

Consider elaborating on both sides of the argument more evenly to improve task achievement. Presenting a more balanced discussion can make your argument stronger.

Coherence and Cohesion

Introduce more varied linking words and phrases to improve the flow of your essay and make the progression of ideas smoother.

Task Achievement

Use specific examples to support your points effectively; consider incorporating statistics, studies, or real-world examples that are closely related to the topic.

Task Achievement

Be cautious of general statements that lack detail. Instead, focus on providing more precise information and examples to strengthen your argument.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion are present and clearly state your viewpoint, providing a solid framework for your essay.

Task Achievement

You effectively use examples to support your points, such as the situation in Ulaanbaatar and the National Waste Report of Australia, which enriches your argument.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Urbanization
Ecological benefits
Biodiversity conservation
Carbon sequestration
Sustainable development
Eco-friendly building materials
Green architecture
Government policies
Urban sprawl
Infrastructure
Smart planning
Agricultural lands
Rural areas
Population growth
Environmental sensitivity

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In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not build new homes there. What is your opinion about this?

Some people think that it is more effective for students to study in a group while others believe that it is better for them to study alone. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

People today are increasingly use credit card to make monthly purchases. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that hard work and determination are the keys to success in life. Some, on other hand, think that there are other factors behind a successful life. Give your opinion.

air transport is increasingly used to export fruit and vegetables to countries where they can not be grown or out season. what are the advantages and disadvantages of this.