Some people want the government to spend more money for looking life on other planets; however, others think that it is a waste of public money when there are so many problems on earth that the government should be solving. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Human
are always searching better life Fix the agreement mistake
Humans
in out
of the planet. Some people believe that the Change preposition
outside
policy makers
allocate the funds to explorers. Correct your spelling
policymakers
However
, on the same scale
other argues that public funds should Add a comma
scale,
be spend
on motherland issues which our Change the verb form
be spent
earth
already facing that need to be adressed
by Correct your spelling
addressed
government
. I believe that spending money on exploring other planets would not be the best solution for humanity Correct article usage
the government
instead
environmental, education
and health Replace the word
educational
problem
.
on the one hand, the proponents Fix the agreement mistake
problems
who
believe that exploring outer space has Correct pronoun usage
apply
need
for community people as our natural resources are Add an article
a need
the need
scarcity
and Replace the word
scarce
scientist
Replace the word
scientific
reasearch
on finding renewable resources will Correct your spelling
research
need
in Wrong verb form
be needed
near
future. Correct article usage
the near
Furthermore
, expolration
Correct your spelling
exploration
has
Verb problem
is
indespensable
for Correct your spelling
indispensable
Add an article
the forecast
a forecast
forecast
to determine the weather Replace the word
forecasting
condition
.
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
On the other hand
, the opponents who
think that the Government budget Correct pronoun usage
apply
spend
on other Change the verb form
spends
earth
problems for
example, education, Add the comma(s)
, for
heathcare
Correct your spelling
healthcare
centers
and deforestation to ameliorate Change the spelling
centres
human's
life. Change noun form
human
In addition
, it is better to allocate the money on
opening and building Change preposition
to
eduaction
institutes and giving scholarships to make Correct your spelling
education
educational
better
future for students. The legal authority should invest the money in projects Correct article usage
a better
such
as urbinization
. Correct your spelling
urbanization
Therefore
, deforestation reduces as it leads to extinct
of Correct article usage
the extinct
green house
and animal species Correct your spelling
greenhouse
from
it climate on Change preposition
apply
earth
has change
which leads Wrong verb form
changed
serious
environmental Change preposition
to serious
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
for
example, drought. Add the comma(s)
, for
Moreover
, it is essential to improve transport
system in slum areas so Add an article
the transport
cfommuners
travel easily.
Correct your spelling
commuters
To conclude
, although
exploring other planets has need
of an hour. On the Correct article usage
a need
countrary
, the Government should spend on Correct your spelling
contrary
earth
issues which it is essential for people better
living on Fix the infinitive
to better
earth
. Hence
, it is the priority to make our homeland instead
of investing in exploring outer space.Submitted by seharfazal9 on
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Structure & Clarity
Consider a clearer structure for your essay. Start with an introduction that clearly presents the topic and your thesis statement. Use distinct paragraphs for discussing each view and your own opinion. This structure will help your essay to be more coherent and cohesive.
Development & Support
Make sure to develop your main points with more detailed examples and explanations. While you've touched on various important issues, further elaboration could help strengthen your argument and make your position clearer.
Grammar & Lexical Resource
Pay attention to grammatical accuracy and variety in your writing. Avoid repeating the same sentence structures and aim to use a wider range of grammatical constructions.
Presentation
Capitalize proper nouns and start each sentence with a capital letter for a more polished appearance. Regularly checking for spelling errors can also significantly improve the overall quality of your writing.
Balance & Coverage
You've presented a balanced view by discussing both sides of the argument, which demonstrates an understanding of the task requirements.
Conclusion
Your conclusion effectively summarises your viewpoint, reinforcing the overall argument of the essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.