IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart below gives information about the most common sports played in New Zealand in 2002.

The chart below gives information about the most common sports played in New Zealand in 2002.
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The bar chart illustrates the percentage of
most
Correct article usage
the most
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 famous
sports
Use synonyms
 played by
girls
Use synonyms
 and
boys
Use synonyms
 in the year 2002 in New Zealand. It can be interpreted that Netball is the favourite game of
girls
Use synonyms
 and on
contrary
Correct article usage
the contrary
show examples
boys
Use synonyms
 are least interested in that
while
Linking Words
 they spend their time playing Soccer.
To begin
Linking Words
with
Add a comma
with,
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 less than 5 per
cent
Use synonyms
females
Change preposition
of females
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 are interested in cricket when compared to
boys
Use synonyms
 a
medicore
Correct your spelling
mediocre
 number of males love
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Cricket on the other side Athletics is almost common in both the groups equally
while
Linking Words
girls
Use synonyms
 are
leding
Correct your spelling
leading
 with 2 per
cent
Use synonyms
. Martial arts is not very common in
girls
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 and 12% of
boys
Use synonyms
enjoys
Change the verb form
enjoy
show examples
 it as a
Use synonyms
sports
Correct the article-noun agreement
sport
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. Basketball and Tennis attracted almost equal
number
Fix the agreement mistake
numbers
show examples
 from both the groups. Netball is the most common
Use synonyms
sports
Fix the agreement mistake
sport
show examples
 for women with about 25 per
cent
Use synonyms
 love to take part in it and almost negligible number of
boys
Use synonyms
 are interested in it. Soccer is mostly common in
boys
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 with
girls
Use synonyms
Correct pronoun usage
who seems
show examples
seems
Correct subject-verb agreement
seem
show examples
 5 per
cent
Use synonyms
 interested in it. Swimming is
also
Linking Words
coomon
Correct your spelling
common
 in
girls
Use synonyms
 and
boys
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 like to do so.
To conclude
Linking Words
 out of the eight most common games
boys
Use synonyms
seems
Correct subject-verb agreement
seem
show examples
 to be
intersted
Correct your spelling
interested
 in seven games more than
girls
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 which means
boys
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 are more interested in
sports
Use synonyms
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, while".
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sports, girls, boys, cent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Popularity
  • Demographic trends
  • Participation rates
  • National sport
  • Cultural impact
  • International identity
  • Generational shifts
  • Grassroots initiatives
  • Sports infrastructure
  • Historical roots
  • Evolution over time
  • Government support
  • Community engagement
  • Sports preferences
  • Future trends
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