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Band 6.5

Some people think thats it's a good idea to socialise with work colleages during evenings and weekend. Other people, think it's important to keep working life completely separate from social life. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#people #thats #idea #socialise #work #colleages #evenings #weekend #life
There are two controversial opinions that socialising with co-workers after a working day and on weekends is a splendid idea.
Nonetheless
, others do believe that it is vital to separate the working and private lives.
This
 essay agrees with the first statement
due to
 the obvious fact that nice relationships with colleagues are the surefire way to productive labour and disagrees with the second statement, as some jobs imply social relations between the workers.  The main benefit of socialising with your colleagues after a tough working day is that it may facilitate the
work
 and lead to a polished outcome. The recent inquiry of the Belorussian Government University has shown that the more workers are sociable, the better and easier the
work
 goes.
However
, despite the obvious pros of spending time with your co-workers, there are still people who do not agree with
such
 a statement. Some people deem that their working and private lives have to stay separated.
This
 essay does not agree with
such
 a belief because, without establishing relations with those with whom you
work
, it may
also
 lead to devastating results
such
 as a decrease in productivity or even the creation of a toxic community among
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
colleagues.
The
Correct article usage
A
show examples
 recent survey
of
Change preposition
by
show examples
 Estonian Psychological University has revealed that 6 out of 10 groups of co-workers that did not maintain contact with each other had problems with toxic communities within them.  To infer, being part of a community where you
work
 is quite essential because it can make the result of your collaboration very productive. At the same time, it is important not to neglect the people with whom you are currently working, as they may have a negative influence on your
work
.
Submitted by katerina21.05 on

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Sentence Variety
Focus on varying your sentence structures to improve readability and sophistication in your writing.
Proofreading
Ensure to proofread your essay to catch and correct minor grammatical errors or typos to maintain high language accuracy.
Detailing Examples
Consider adding more detailed examples and evidence to strengthen your arguments and make them more persuasive.
Task Response
You've done a good job of discussing both views as requested in the prompt.
Structure
Your essay has a clear logical structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Opinion Clarity
You provided a clear opinion, making your stance on the topic known, as required for a high score in Task Response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • team cohesion
  • work-life balance
  • professional boundaries
  • foster
  • supportive work environment
  • job satisfaction
  • productivity
  • diversity in social interactions
  • prevent burnout
  • conflicts of interest
  • favoritism
  • setting clear boundaries
  • enhance communication
  • invasive stress
  • maintain diversity
  • prevent burnout
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