Some people believe that the increasing use of technology in education significantly enhances the learning experience. Others think that it leads to greater distraction and hinders the learning process. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Technology connecting with education may present more educational benefits,
whereas
some people argue that
this
approach might result in certain drawbacks in terms of distraction. In
this
essay, I will illustrate both viewpoints and debate that the advantages of the measure outweigh the disadvantages because of its multi-faceted learning. On the one hand, in contemporary times, students can utilize many technological devices to become more efficient in learning.
For instance
, the use of iPads has increased significantly
due to
its holistic educational software,
such
as ChatGpt, Quizlet, and IELTS Band9. With the software, students can be more efficient in learning, fixing their mistakes instantaneously.
Furthermore
, augmented reality (AR) can provide virtual classrooms to learn as same as reality, addressing certain physical barriers.
Consequently
, these educational benefits considerably enhance the quality of learning.
On the other hand
, using technology to study may have more likelihood of causing distraction because the internet contains excessive elements to attract individuals' interest.
For example
, many educational experts indicate that technological devices
such
as smartphones iPads, and computers are more likely to lead to losing the concentration of pupils.
In addition
, abundant social media and online games may
also
cause them addicted, ultimately decreasing their learning quality.
However
, from my perspective, the learning efficiency of technological education outweighs that of tradition. People not only can absorb knowledge immediately but
also
can learn more comprehensively
such
as artificial intelligence, which represents substantial resources to assist humans in studying.
Additionally
, some apps
such
as Flora have provided restrictions on social media, prevented students from overusing it, and ensured the efficiency of learning.
To sum up
, it is inevitable that using technological devices to learn may lead to some distraction problems,
However
, some individuals and I argue that
this
educational approach can indeed present more comprehensive functions, thereby increasing the learning quality and other educational benefits.
Submitted by daniellin0717 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that your arguments are logically ordered. Although the essay is well-structured, there can be a stronger connection between the advantages and disadvantages presented.
task achievement
Be consistent in the use of terminology and ensure accurate distinctions are made (e.g., technological devices vs. technology, learning vs. studying). This will help in making your arguments clearer.
task achievement
The essay provides relevant and specific examples, such as the use of specific applications like ChatGPT and Quizlet, to support the arguments.
coherence cohesion
A clear and logical structure is maintained throughout the essay with a strong introduction and conclusion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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