It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #risks #lives

It is essential for human to take

risks

, from their career to their wealth.

This

essay argues that the benefits of huge

promotion

Fix the agreement mistake

promotions

show examples

and gigantic

profit

Fix the agreement mistake

profits

show examples

outweigh the

drawback

Fix the agreement mistake

drawbacks

show examples

of getting into debt. The most advantageous factor of taking

risks

is that it can bring substantial interest in investment.

This

is to say, individuals tend to make all the

efforts

Fix the agreement mistake

effort

show examples

to think about the aim and try to earn

Correct word choice

as much

show examples

interest as they can.

Then

, with personal finance from investment,

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

show examples

now can enjoy and afford for comfortable life.

As a result

, the economy from risky investment can supply to living conditions of a person or family. Another point worth

consideration

Replace the word

considering

show examples

is the quick promotion individuals can achieve. It is undeniable that special

invention

Fix the agreement mistake

inventions

show examples

without imagination will provide success that dives into

career

Add an article

a career

show examples

Therefore

, people can stay at a high place in a company or an organization despite their young age. In recent years,

for example

, teenagers who are talented

make

Wrong verb form

have made

show examples

efforts to gain recognition from the public to reach higher positions in their jobs.

However

, failing to take

risks

can bring negative effects on

human’s

Change noun form

human

show examples

life. To explain it is not easy to pass on a risk,

therefore

, people could get into debt if they do not realise their limit.

For instance

, a large number of Vietnamese young broke in their twenties

due to

investing in

wrong

Correct article usage

the wrong

show examples

directions

such

ass business, virtual coins, etc that bring them into a loss. Take into account,

taking

Correct word choice

that taking

show examples

risks

in life sometimes assists

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

show examples

in both personal

career

Fix the agreement mistake

careers

show examples

and personal

live

Replace the word

lives

show examples

however

, disadvantages

also

exist that

effect

Correct your spelling

affect

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

personal finance.

Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on Fri May 03 2024

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task achievement

To enhance task achievement, ensure your ideas are thoroughly developed. Provide more specific and varied examples to support your points.

coherence cohesion

Make sure to clearly organize your essay with distinct paragraphs for each main idea. This will improve coherence and make your points easier to follow.

coherence cohesion

Work on using more precise language and correcting minor grammatical errors to improve overall clarity and flow.

coherence cohesion

The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame the argument well.

task achievement

You provided relevant examples, especially the example of Vietnamese youth investing poorly, which adds depth to the argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

267 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Topic Vocabulary:

Opportunities
Growth
Innovation
Challenges
Self-discovery
Resilience
Uncertainty
Consequences
Calculated risks
Stagnation
Regret
Comfort zone
Entrepreneurship
Adventurous spirit
Thriving
Failure
Mitigate
Reap the rewards

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It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on lerning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree?

your friend wants to send his/her children to your house for the weekend write a letter to him/her and say agree to this arrangement say what time is suitable for you. Describe what are you planning to do.

Most high level positions in companies are filled by men even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than 50 percent female. Companies should be required to allocate a certain percentage of these positions to women. To what extent do you agree?

More and more people are becoming seriously overweight. Some people suggest that the solution to this problem is to increase the price of fattening foods. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Boxing is a bloody sports which often results in physics injuries. It is inappropriate for this sport to exist in the modern age. Do you agree or disagree?