Some people think most crimes are the result of circumstances like poverty and other social problems. Others believe that they are caused by people who are bad in nature. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Wrongdoers commit a variety of
crimes
and some continue committing crimes
. Some people
argue that these crimes
stem from their bad intuition and beliefs, while
others think that the environment affects on
offenders, which will be discussed in Change preposition
apply
this
essay.
On the one hand, some individuals have more potential to commit crimes
, who can commit high- class
felonies. To be more specific, some Correct your spelling
high-class
people
carry specific genes that can be considered as the source of criminal actions. Therefore
, people
’s nature can impact their apply
attitudes. Wrong verb form
applied
For example
, according to
research in many crimes
, criminals are observed among the family members or relatives of the perpetrators.
On the other hand
, not all intuitive things can impact individuals’ behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
if
determined after a certain time. The environment can play a Correct your spelling
is
significantly
role Change the adverb
significant
human
life. Change preposition
in human
In other words
, some issues undergo
committing Verb problem
accompany
crimes
, such
as lack of education and proper upbringing. Studying education is a hindrance against
committing Change preposition
to
crimes
in the future. In some families, teenagers deprive can parents of upbringing
. Correct pronoun usage
their upbringing
Thus
, people
are prone to more crimes
.
In conclusion, some people
believe that they are bad in nature which can be related to genes who doer crimes
. However
, others argue that the environment affects pivotal human actions, such
as lack of education and proper upbringing.Submitted by quluzadenurlan107 on
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task achievement
Work on developing your ideas more thoroughly with clearer, more specific examples. This will enhance your task achievement score.
coherence cohesion
Focus on organizing your essay in a more logical manner. A clear introduction, detailed body paragraphs, and a concise conclusion will strengthen your argument's flow.
language
Pay attention to minor inaccuracies in grammar and vocabulary. Although they do not heavily impact your score, improving them will refine the overall quality of your essay.
task achievement
You successfully discussed both views as requested in the task, showing a good understanding of the essay question.
coherence cohesion
You provided a conclusion that summarizes your discussion and presents your opinion, which is essential for a well-rounded essay.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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