in some countries university students live at home with their families, whereas in other countries, students should attend university in another city . Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?
There is no denying the fact that studying at universities plays a crucial role in our lives.
While
it is a commonly held belief that students
will gain more benefits if they live away from home
during their university studies, there is also
an argument that they may be exposed to some drawbacks. This
essay will discuss this
matter, and express my opinion.
On one hand, when students
leave their home
to study in another city, particularly after finishing their secondary school, there is a probability of exposure to some issues. In other words
, they may suffer financially because their expenses will increase, as they have to pay monthly rent for their new home
. In addition
, they will be away from the direct pieces of advice and monitoring from their parents, so they make a lot of mistakes. Moreover
, they may go astray, especially if their new friends are notorious. For example
, some students
may not complete their studies and go through the wrong ways.
On the other hand
, many benefits are accomplished when they study abroad or away from their home
cities. It is also
possible to say that they gain more positive criteria, such
as their self-confidence rises, which enables them to challenge any obstacles that they may face in their future career. Furthermore
, they can recognize new cultures and customs as a result
of dealing with new colleagues from various societies, therefore
their communication skills become much better. For instance
, students
who studied away from their homes achieved great success in their lives like Dr. Ahmed Zwel.
In conclusion, there are no easy answers to this
question. On balance, however
, I believe that students
will obtain many positive impacts, as a result
of studying away from their homes and surely, these positive effects are higher than all the disadvantages.Submitted by sm710129 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
structure
You've structured your essay well with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This organization helped in presenting your arguments coherently.
examples
Try including more concrete examples and data to support your points. While the example of Dr. Ahmed Zwel is good, additional examples could further strengthen your argument.
transition
Ensure a smooth and logical transition between paragraphs. Using transitional phrases can enhance the flow of your essay, making your arguments more cohesive.
conclusion
While you've done a good job of addressing the task, refining your conclusion with a stronger emphasis on your personal stance could offer a more solid end to your essay. Restate your main argument more forcefully to leave a lasting impression.
balance
Presented both sides of the argument effectively, showing a balanced understanding of the topic.
use of examples
Successfully used an example to illustrate a point, adding credibility to your argument.
argument consistency
Maintained a clear position throughout the essay, contributing to a consistent and persuasive argument.