in some countries university students live at home with their families, whereas in other countries, students should attend university in another city . Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #university #students #home #families #city

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There is no denying the fact that studying at universities plays a crucial role in our lives.

While

it is a commonly held belief that

students

will gain more benefits if they live away from

home

during their university studies, there is

also

an argument that they may be exposed to some drawbacks.

This

essay will discuss

this

matter, and express my opinion. On one hand, when

students

leave their

home

to study in another city, particularly after finishing their secondary school, there is a probability of exposure to some issues.

In other words

, they may suffer financially because their expenses will increase, as they have to pay monthly rent for their new

home

In addition

, they will be away from the direct pieces of advice and monitoring from their parents, so they make a lot of mistakes.

Moreover

, they may go astray, especially if their new friends are notorious.

For example

, some

students

may not complete their studies and go through the wrong ways.

On the other hand

, many benefits are accomplished when they study abroad or away from their

home

cities. It is

also

possible to say that they gain more positive criteria,

such

as their self-confidence rises, which enables them to challenge any obstacles that they may face in their future career.

Furthermore

, they can recognize new cultures and customs

as a result

of dealing with new colleagues from various societies,

therefore

their communication skills become much better.

For instance

students

who studied away from their homes achieved great success in their lives like Dr. Ahmed Zwel. In conclusion, there are no easy answers to

this

question. On balance,

however

, I believe that

students

will obtain many positive impacts,

as a result

of studying away from their homes and surely, these positive effects are higher than all the disadvantages.

Submitted by sm710129 on Sat May 04 2024

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structure

You've structured your essay well with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This organization helped in presenting your arguments coherently.

examples

Try including more concrete examples and data to support your points. While the example of Dr. Ahmed Zwel is good, additional examples could further strengthen your argument.

transition

Ensure a smooth and logical transition between paragraphs. Using transitional phrases can enhance the flow of your essay, making your arguments more cohesive.

conclusion

While you've done a good job of addressing the task, refining your conclusion with a stronger emphasis on your personal stance could offer a more solid end to your essay. Restate your main argument more forcefully to leave a lasting impression.

balance

Presented both sides of the argument effectively, showing a balanced understanding of the topic.

use of examples

Successfully used an example to illustrate a point, adding credibility to your argument.

argument consistency

Maintained a clear position throughout the essay, contributing to a consistent and persuasive argument.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

302 words

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in some countries university students live at home with their families, whereas in other countries, students should attend university in another city . Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?

International tourism has brought enormous benefits to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the environment. Do the disadvantages of international tourism outweigh the advantages?

In some countries, there has been an increase in the number of parents choosing to self-educate their children at home rather then sending them to school. Do the advantages of home education outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that all teenagers should be required to do unpaid work in their free time to help the local community. They believe this would benefit both the individual teenager and society as a whole. Do you agree or disagree?

in some places, old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important.

In some countries, owing a home rather than renting is very important. *why might this be the case *Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

In some countries, owing a home rather than renting is very important. why might this be the case Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?