Some people soy thol industrial growth is necessory to solve poverty, but some other people orgue that industrial growth is causing environmental problems and it should be stopped. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #soy #thol #growth #necessory #poverty #orgue

firstly

, the escalation of the industrial sector particularly in the soy thol product provides several advantages for society.

for instance

, it will cut off unemployment

due to

the increasing of job fields in which the firm requires more workers.

Furthermore

, big opportunities to get a job will make the problem of poverty within the community immediately decrease in line with economic growth.

thus

, the government should be paying attention to considering the balancing of benefits in the industry sector.

on the other hand

, the industrial sector has an impact on environmental degradation and health problems for people who live around it.

for example

, the amount of CO2 released into the atmosphere as an emission of the factory might threaten the safety of many people.

Moreover

, pollution is dangerous for health if it is inhaled in large quantities, it will cause complications in the respiratory system.

therefore

, monitoring in industries should be stricter in order to minimize the impact on the human body.

Submitted by gunawankohan on Sun May 05 2024

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Introduction & Conclusion

Consider including a clear introduction and conclusion to frame your essay. This will help in providing a complete response and enhancing the overall clarity of your argument.

Proofreading

Make sure to proofread your essay for typos and minor inaccuracies to maintain coherence.

Examples

Expand on your examples by explaining how they support your point more thoroughly, which will strengthen your argument.

Language Variety

Try to use a range of sentence structures and vocabulary to enrich your essay and make it more interesting to read.

Balance

You've done well in discussing both views of the topic, showing a balanced approach.

Examples

Effective use of examples to support your points.

Logical Flow

Maintained a logical flow within paragraphs.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

2 paragraphs

162 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people soy thol industrial growth is necessory to solve poverty, but some other people orgue that industrial growth is causing environmental problems and it should be stopped. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Include an introduction and conclusion

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Children who are brought up in a family that does not have a lot of money are better prepared to deal with problems when they become adults than children who are brought up by wealthy parents. Do agree or disagree with the statement.

Too much emphasis is given for education of the young. More government money should be spent to free time activity of young people. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+