IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Students should pay the full cost for their own study, because university eduation benefits individuals rather than society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#students #cost #study #university #eduation #individuals #society
Many individuals believe that learners ought to pay the total fee for their education, as university education brings beneficial impacts on each person rather than the community. Despite the writer contending that the
students
’ academic progress will contribute to the national development. The reason why some people advocate that
students
 should pay all their learning fees by themselves is that the academic level of the learners will not serve the community. The main purpose of personal learning is to prepare for
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
future careers more sustainable and less challenging than those who do not study.
Consequently
,
this
 makes people think that it only benefits individuals’ purposes and the
students
 can
also
 be more aware of working hard to afford their studying.
For example
,
students
 who have to pay the whole cost of their education are aware of using money economically and logically. These manners will be formed during their university years.
Hence
, it is important for pupils to pay the full cost for their learning progress.
On the other hand
, it should be acknowledged that the
students’
Correct your spelling
student’s
show examples
 academic abilities will contribute to the social advantages in many aspects. What the author means is that every single generation of
students
 is the future of a country for a long period of time, as their talents are used to develop the whole country.
Otherwise
, every learner is hopeful to be a useful resident of a nation and their motivation
of working
Change preposition
to work
show examples
 harder and harder is being a pride of their parents and their countries. Taking all points into account, the
students’
Correct your spelling
student’s
show examples
 academic ability not only serves their personal purposes but
also
 contributes to the national development as they are parts of the society and that’s
also
 their responsibility.

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Task Response
Maintain a clear stance throughout the essay to enhance argument strength.
Task Response
Include more detailed, specific examples to support your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to use a variety of linking words to improve the flow of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Organize paragraphs clearly, with one main idea per paragraph, to enhance readability.
Coherence and Cohesion
You've effectively introduced and concluded your essay, providing a clear overview of your stance.
Language Skill
You've demonstrated a good range in vocabulary usage.
Task Response
Your essay discusses both viewpoints, which enriches your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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