Art should be a compulsory class for high school students. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#art #class #school #students

As the importance of

art

class

has been acknowledged by educators and experts in modern society, lots of people argue that artistic

class

should

Add a missing verb

be mendatory

show examples

mendatory

Correct your spelling

mandatory

for high

school

students

. I support

this

idea because

articstic

Correct your spelling

artistic

activities can give

students

several advantages that academic subjects do not.

Firstly

art

classes should be

necessarly

Correct your spelling

necessarily

included in

high

Add an article

the high

show examples

school

curriculum because they help

students

to express their emotions indirectly. As

students

grow, and they get

Change preposition

into

show examples

their

puverty

Correct your spelling

poverty

puberty

, they generally feel

embarasse

Correct your spelling

embarrassed

embarrass

about expressing their feelings directly even with their friends. So, there would be no opportunity to vent

Change preposition

apply

show examples

about their worries. In

this

situation,

art

alsses

Correct your spelling

classes

lasses

can make

students

share their moods by making artistic works. For

exemple

Correct your spelling

example

students

can draw or paint something based on how they feel currently.

Therefore

artistic

Add an article

the artistic

an artistic

show examples

class

Fix the agreement mistake

classes

show examples

should be required to let

students

Change the verb form

apply

show examples

express fully their feelings.

Moreover

, artistic classes need to be compulsory because

students

should have a chance to find their non-academic

talents

in those

clasees

Correct your spelling

classes

. In high

school

students

are spending

Wrong verb form

spend

show examples

majority

Add an article

the majority

a majority

show examples

of their time

Change preposition

apply

show examples

learning academic subjects

such

mathmatics

Correct your spelling

mathematics

and science.

Thus

students

who are

Correct your spelling

not

show examples

interested in those subjects can get

Change the article

apply

show examples

time to find other

talents

through

art

classes. For

exemple

Correct your spelling

example

students

can realize that they have a fondness for drawing so, they can consistently develop

handcraft

Wrong verb form

handcrafting

show examples

skills in

art

class

Therefore

it is clear that

schools have to give various opportunities for high

school

students

to find their own

talents

To sum up

, it is undeniable that

art

surly

Correct your spelling

surely

show examples

need

Change the verb form

needs

show examples

to be a

mandotory

Correct your spelling

mandatory

class

in high

school

because it allows

students

to express their emotions indirectly and find their artistic

talents

Submitted by jb22809467 on Mon May 06 2024

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task achievement

Your essay addresses the topic effectively, with a clear stance supporting the idea that art should be a compulsory class for high school students. To further enhance your task achievement, ensure your arguments are fully developed and include a wider range of examples to support your points.

coherence cohesion

Your essay is generally well-organized, with a clear progression of ideas. To improve coherence and cohesion, consider using a wider variety of linking phrases to better connect your ideas and paragraphs. Also, pay attention to paragraph structure to ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea.

task achievement

You effectively communicate your support for the idea that art classes offer unique benefits to high school students, which helps in task achievement.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively bookend your essay, contributing to its overall coherence and cohesion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

277 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Art should be a compulsory class for high school students. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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