Modern technology is now very common in most work places. How do you think this has changed the way we work? Do you think there are disadvantages of relying too much on technology?

Nowadays, it is common
that
Correct word choice
for
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modern technologies
are
Change the verb form
to be
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relied on by most
companies
, especially in the digital field. In my opinion,
companies
can do their work faster and more accurately by using smart tools, but when
people
depend too much on them, it can cause severe consequences,
such
as unemployment and health issues First of all, in terms of time management, smart tools can help workers with their work.
In other words
,employees are able to carry out more tasks in a limited time by using
technology
.
For example
, stock analysers use
technology
to accelerate the process.
Thus
, they are able to analyze a huge number of data within a limited time.
Secondly
,it increases the percentage of the accuracy.
That is
to say, there are some jobs that require a high level of accuracy. In
this
case,
technology
is needed to perform the tasks perfectly.
For instance
, accountants use
technology
to deal with numbers owing to the importance of accuracy in the banking industry.
Finally
, one problem of heavy reliance on
technology
is that it leads to unemployment. To explain, there are many
people
around the world who are affected negatively by advanced
technology
. To illustrate, in Japan, in car manufacturers particularly, workers have lost their jobs and have been replaced by robots. Another issue is that when
people
rely too much on
technology
, they will suffer from some health issues. Simply put. when
people
sit in front of the computer for hours, they will have issues with their eyes and spine.
To sum up
,
although
technology
helps
companies
in many aspects, heavy reliance on it can bring about many problems.
Therefore
, it is essential for all
companies
to have a balance in the usage of modern
technology
.
Submitted by s_syedy on

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task achievement
Your essay effectively addresses the prompt, providing a balanced view on the use of technology in workplaces. This shows a good understanding of the task requirements.
coherence cohesion
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