In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the popluation in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Nowadays,
people
move from small towns and villages to big cities. This
has caused population problems in cities.
I firmly believe that this
idea has a very negative impact on people
's lives
, such
as pollution and lack of services for individuals.
First of all, when someone lives
in a rural area, they often think that if they lived in an urban area, they would have so many opportunities in different areas like a better education system, more job opportunities and also
an advanced health care system.
All of these reasons lead a person to decide to move to and live in a city
. Although
this
choice brings so many benefits to rural people
, it will bring many serious disadvantages to urban people
.
The first major problem for the
Correct article usage
apply
city
dwellers is pollution, this
problem will endanger the lives
of the citizens and cause so many breathing problems for them and their children, it will also
destroy the plants and trees. For example
, in my country, Iran, so many people
have moved to the capital city
to study and work, now the capital city
, which is called Tehran, is very polluted and has taken over so many lives
.
Another big problem for the citizens of the city
is the lack of facilities for people
. This
means that with more people
in a city
there has to be enough equipment and supplies for everyone, which is actually very difficult for governments and requires a big budget, sometimes governments cannot provide them for all the Add a comma
city,
people
and it makes a city
clean out of supplies.
For example
, during the coronavirus pandemic, some overpopulated cities could not provide enough vaccines for everyone and a lot of people
died.
To sum up
, as I mentioned in this
essay, I am completely against the idea of rural people
moving to urban areas and I have this
belief that this
thing will not have a positive development for everyone because of issues like pollution and lack of facilities.Submitted by abbasisarina340 on
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introduction
Begin with a clearer introduction that directly addresses the question of whether the movement from rural to urban areas is positive or negative. This will immediately clarify your position to the reader.
argument development
Work on developing more balanced arguments throughout your essay. While it's clear you view the trend negatively, mentioning potential positives before refuting them strengthens your argument.
paragraphing
Use paragraphing to organize your ideas more clearly. Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea, supported by examples or further explanation. This will enhance the coherence of your essay.
language competency
Try to include a wider range of vocabulary and sentence structures. This not only makes your writing more engaging but also demonstrates your language proficiency to the examiner.
conclusion
In your conclusion, restate your main points more succinctly and reinforce your view without introducing new information. This will provide a strong, persuasive end to your essay.
content understanding
Your essay effectively identifies significant negative impacts of rural-to-urban migration, such as pollution and strained public services.
use of examples
You provide specific examples, like the situation in Tehran, which strengthens the credibility of your arguments.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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