IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think that space exploration can benefit humans in many aspects. Others think that it has many drawbacks. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Today, there is an argument between
people
Use synonyms
 who believe that exploring places that are placed outside of the
earth
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's
atmosphere
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 would have a
lot
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 of advantages
while
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 others think that
this
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 exploration's disadvantages outweigh its
benefits
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.
This
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 essay will argue that finding other galaxies for living is one of the
benefits
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 of travelling to outer
space
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 which has more
benefits
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 than do not explore there. On the one hand, these days the vast majority of individuals in different societies think that having a trip to another galaxies would be useful not only for human beings but
also
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 for humans' future. Since the
earth
Use synonyms
 has been struggling with climate change
as well as
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 increasing the general temperature, societies need to find a place on other
planets
Use synonyms
 where they can build their new houses.
As a result
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, a
lot
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 of useful information will be collected by cutting-edge telescopes but
also
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 by using
this
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 knowledge,
people
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 can find a place
that is
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 exactly like
Earth
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 for future living.
For instance
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, the James Webb telescope was launched to collect data from different
planets
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 in 2019.
On the other hand
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, some other
people
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 believe that having travel outside the
earth
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's
atmosphere
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 would be harmful. The footprint of
space
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 garbage outside of the
earth
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's
atmosphere
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 has increased in the
last
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 decade because of huge human-made instruments that have been launched into
space
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 and
this
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 rubbish would have a negative effect on the Milky Way and other
planets
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.
However
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, by improving technology in recent years, a
lot
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 of outer
space
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 instruments have been constructed from disposable materials, so the rate of
space
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 garbage will be decreased.
For instance
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, the
last
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 shuttle that was built by NASA was constructed by titanium which does not have a negative effect on the
atmosphere
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. In conclusion, these days some
people
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 believe that
space
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 exploration will have a
lot
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 of
benefits
Use synonyms
while
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 others have the opposite prospect.
This
Linking Words
 essay argues that
space
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 exploration will create an opportunity to find a new place for
people
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 to live on other
planets
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 and improving the technology will reduce the production of
space
Use synonyms
 garbage.

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task achievement
Try to maintain a clear and consistent argument throughout your essay without contradicting your stance. Provide a balanced discussion of both views before clearly stating your opinion.
coherence cohesion
Enhance your coherence by explicitly linking your ideas and paragraphs with a range of cohesive devices. This will make your argument flow more naturally.
coherence cohesion
Incorporate a wider variety of sentence structures to enhance readability and clarity of your arguments.
task achievement
Ensure your examples are clearly linked to the points you're making, reinforcing your arguments effectively.
introspection
You effectively introduced and concluded your essay, presenting your stance clearly.
task achievement
Provided relevant examples to support your arguments, strengthening your essay.
task achievement
Successfully addressed both views on space exploration, demonstrating an understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Space exploration
  • Technological advancements
  • Scientific knowledge
  • Universe
  • Solar system
  • Life on other planets
  • Satellite communication
  • GPS
  • Medical equipment
  • Financial cost
  • Resource allocation
  • Environmental concerns
  • Space debris
  • Pollution
  • Global cooperation
  • International tensions
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