IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

water scarcity is a serious problem in many countries. What are the causes of this? And what solutions can be done by individuals and the government?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays,
water
Use synonyms
 shortage is a significant issue in a lot of countries.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss what causes
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon and provide solutions. To start with, owing to an increasing population, the demand for
water
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 grows. There are some nations in the world that do have not access to drinkable
water
Use synonyms
 which leads to diseases and growing death rates among infants and adults.
According to
Linking Words
 the World Health Organization, more than half of the human population is suffering from
water
Use synonyms
 scarcity and multiple ailments. Another reason is human activity
such
Linking Words
 as factories which throw out toxic waste into the rivers and other local
water
Use synonyms
 sources .
Additionally
Linking Words
, the
water
Use synonyms
 that was contaminated resulted in the extinction of marine species that purified the
water
Use synonyms
.
Consequently
Linking Words
, that
water
Use synonyms
 can be harmful for usage.
For instance
Linking Words
, there was research in 2013 conducted by Green Peace which revealed that companies that dumped radioactive waste into the seas caused thousands of deaths and decades-long consequences.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, governments and people can take some actions to prevent
this
Linking Words
 problem.
Firstly
Linking Words
, individuals can reduce
water
Use synonyms
 waste by using
water
Use synonyms
-efficient appliances and
also
Linking Words
 practising rain harvesting.
Moreover
Linking Words
, they can invest in modernizing
water
Use synonyms
 infrastructure to reduce losses and ensure efficient distribution.
Secondly
Linking Words
, local authorities can implement taxes or tough punishment on factories which pollute the environment and
water
Use synonyms
. To illustrate
this
Linking Words
, the US government put immense taxes on companies which throw trash into the local
water
Use synonyms
 rivers.
Finally
Linking Words
, citizens have to control how they use
water
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as choosing a convertible shower
instead
Linking Words
 of a bath.
For example
Linking Words
, a recent statistical analysis found that an enormous amount of
water
Use synonyms
 pours out into nowhere
while
Linking Words
 people brush their teeth. So, scientists suggested closing the tap
while
Linking Words
 doing oral care. Taking everything into consideration, the growing population and human activities can cause issues with
water
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, officials and people can change
this
Linking Words
 situation by focusing on it.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence and Cohesion
Try to vary your sentence structure more to make your essay engaging and to demonstrate your range of grammatical structures.
Coherence and Cohesion
Incorporate a wider range of linking words and phrases to enhance cohesion between ideas and paragraphs.
Task Achievement
When providing examples, ensure they are fully developed and directly linked to your main ideas to strengthen your argument.
Task Achievement
Consider expanding on the solutions by discussing the potential effectiveness and feasibility of each proposed solution, giving a more balanced and in-depth analysis.
Task Achievement
Your essay effectively addresses all parts of the task, providing causes and solutions to the problem of water scarcity.
Coherence and Cohesion
Good use of an introductory sentence that set the topic and scope of the essay.
Task Achievement
Effective use of examples, such as the Green Peace research, to support your arguments.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • water scarcity
  • overconsumption
  • depletion
  • inefficient
  • outdated irrigation
  • climate change
  • potable water
  • water-efficient appliances
  • rainwater harvesting
  • conservation
  • modernizing infrastructure
  • environmental regulations
  • sustainable water management
What to do next:
Look at other essays: