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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary schools. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#experts #children #language #schools #outweigh
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Over the period of globalization, there has been a suggestion about the inclusion of foreign
language
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 in the primary schools’ curriculum by experts. It seems that
,
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apply
show examples
this
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 change might contribute to positive impacts on pupils
such
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 as fluency in another
language
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 and a chance to promote admissions for future purposes.
Although
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 there are some concerns about timetables and a mixture of
languages
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, I absolutely believe that the inclusion of
languages
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 in primary schools is preferable rather than in secondary schools.
To begin
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, one of the profound benefits might be the ability to speak fluently. The sooner students begin learning
languages
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, the easier it will be to communicate with others. Studies have shown it will allow them to achieve a high level of
language
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 proficiency,
thus
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 making them better equipped to navigate in the competitive world. To illustrate, inhabitants of the Netherlands, especially the youth are considered to be one of the nations who speak English fluently, showing off about 93% of the level of fluency. It is believed that they are engaged in
languages
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 since childhood; taught in primary schools and they can be offered for workplaces worldwide
due to
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 mastering international
languages
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.
In addition
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, foreign
languages
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 might assist in exploring and greater understanding of other nations. Nowadays, it is common to learn English as it may provide career prospects and other aspects. Turning to drawbacks, there is a chance of a mixture of
languages
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 during communication which may lead to issues of thinking abilities. If people know a number of
languages
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, they might mix them and mislead other people.
Furthermore
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, individuals might forget their culture by speaking in a second
language
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 since it can become easier to speak rather than in their native which leads to a loss of national identity.
For instance
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, it is a huge problem among Kazakh people because
once
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they were colonised under the Soviet Union and pushed by the government to speak in Russian
language
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, which is foreign . In conclusion, it is better to start studying a second
language
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 at an early age as it may provide future prospects, starting from travelling to a career.
Submitted by adiletnursoltanov on

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task response
Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea with examples directly supporting it.
task response
Consider discussing both advantages and disadvantages in separate paragraphs to maintain clarity.
task response
Maintain a balance between general statements and specific examples to strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Use a variety of linking words to connect ideas and paragraphs smoothly.
task response
Effective use of examples to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay demonstrates a strong logical flow of ideas.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear and relate directly back to the essay topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cognitive development
  • Brain plasticity
  • Multicultural awareness
  • Curriculum
  • Globalization
  • Proficiency
  • Linguistic skills
  • Academic performance
  • Mother tongue
  • Bilingualism
  • Foreign language acquisition
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