IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Animal testing has always been controversial issue. Some people believe that governments should ban these practices completely. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Whether the authorities should forbid experiments on animals is a controversial problem.
Although
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 I do not agree with the idea of animal testing, I do have some reasons to appreciate the results of these tests.
To begin
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 with, animals that are used for laboratory exams have feelings like pain, uncomfortable etc. To be specific, because of the similar structure of humans, scientists need to use animals to know their reactions to a particular substance.
Consequently
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,
animalkind
Correct your spelling
animal kind
animal-kind
 has to undergo terrible pain.
For example
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, one of the steps in cosmetic development is animal testing, like shampoo, though they are not essential for living.
This
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 way, we are suffering the other species for our pleasure.
However
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, there is no doubt that great discoveries have been made from animal testing. A few pandemic diseases
such
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 as the plague have been completely eliminated.
Furthermore
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, thanks to medicine research, has made it possible for us to get away from some serious illnesses.
For instance
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, in most countries, governments made these vaccines available to common people in public hospitals to be given from birth.
Due to
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this
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, many countries are leading peaceful lives.
On the other hand
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, there are many serious problems if the government ban all animal testing practices.
For example
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,if vaccine demand significantly increases in a particular country which faces a deadly virus, because the government banned animal testing, the vaccine cannot be produced.
Hence
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, a lot of people died. In conclusion,animal testing is a controversial issue because it is immoral to make them suffer.
Although
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 it's a cruel act, it is still necessary for our peaceful lives.

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task response
Be sure to directly and explicitly state your agreement or disagreement with the topic in the introduction for clarity.
task response
Maintain a consistent viewpoint throughout the essay to ensure task achievement is aligned with the prompt.
task response
Include more specific examples or evidence to support your arguments, which would strengthen your essay significantly.
coherence cohesion
Use a variety of linking words and phrases to ensure a smooth flow between your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your essay paragraphs are well-organized, each focusing on a single main idea to aid in coherence.
task response
You've successfully discussed both sides of the argument, contributing to a well-rounded discussion.
coherence cohesion
Your essay structure effectively includes an introduction, body, and conclusion, which aids in reader comprehension.
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