Today, many people do not know their neighbors. Why is this? What can be done about this?

In recent years, it has become increasingly common for individuals to be less connected with their immediate
neighbours
. In my opinion,
this
is largely a result of a more insular society and can be somewhat alleviated through initiatives that encourage more community interaction. The main reason that many residents today do not often speak with their
neighbours
is that the world is more physically isolated. In past generations, people were more in the habit of going outside and occupying their time by talking with those living nearby. Today, the rise of technology allows the average person to do a variety of activities online including talking with friends, watching movies, playing computer games, and listening to music. These habits now occupy the vast majority of a person’s time and there is no longer a need to interact with one’s neighbor out of boredom or a feeling of connection.
This
modern tendency can be countered by more communal activities. Since there is no reversing technological advancement, it must be countered through proactive measures. An example of
this
would be a local government organizing a festival or musical performance in a park.
Neighbours
who meet at
such
events are likely to form connections and
thereafter
remain in contact as either casual acquaintances or actual friends. If governments are unwilling to undertake
such
initiatives,
then
local citizens can
also
organize various events. The result over time will be a gradual thawing of relations between
neighbours
. In conclusion, the way people live today leads to less interaction with one’s neighbors and
this
phenomenon can be mitigated with more community events. If nothing is done, society will only become more fractured and alienating.
Submitted by bita.rezaei7052 on

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Task Achievement
To improve your score, consider adding more concrete examples to support your points. While you've mentioned community events as a solution, providing specific, real-world examples could make your argument more compelling.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay is well-structured, but to enhance coherence, you could consider adding more transition phrases between paragraphs and within them to better guide the reader through your argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively encapsulate the main points of your essay, contributing to a strong logical structure.
Task Achievement
You have provided a thorough response to the prompt, addressing both the reasons why people may not know their neighbors and proposing solutions to this issue.

Fully explain your ideas

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • community engagement
  • social isolation
  • neighborhood watch
  • local initiatives
  • virtual interaction
  • privacy concerns
  • resident mobility
  • technological advancements
  • social media influence
  • work-life balance
  • busy personal schedules
  • community events
  • local residents
  • social interaction
  • community ties
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