We cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

There are several

people

Use synonyms

in the world who suffer from poverty, war and disease who need support from other nations. Some believe that it is not necessary to worry about other countries

Punctuation problem

;

show examples

they should care about their own society. I strongly disagree with

this

Linking Words

perspective. On the one hand, it is true that

people

Use synonyms

should assist their own citizens and always prioritise them. There are still many poor individuals in each community who need help from their government.

For example

Linking Words

, in some hospitals, there are several patients who are unable to pay extra money for the hospital.

As a result

Linking Words

, individuals and the government can create a charity to collect money for these types of families.

Also

Linking Words

, rich

people

Use synonyms

can donate money in order to support poor

people

Use synonyms

Thus

Linking Words

, by doing

this

Linking Words

job unhappy society turns into a peaceful and happy country.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, I believe that in some developing countries, there is still poverty, which means they need help. The governments in these nations are unable to create a better standard of living for their

people

Use synonyms

because they do not have sufficient resources to use

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

in order to provide welfare and adequate facilities for their

people

Use synonyms

Furthermore

Linking Words

, other communities should be concerned about poor foreign individuals.

For instance

Linking Words

, rich societies can send food, clothes, medicine and other basic needs

for

Change preposition

show examples

poor countries to support them.

As a result

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

all over the world make a strong bond between themselves and create peace. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

being concerned about

owr

Correct your spelling

our

own country is crucial, it is important to assist poor communities to have a great world and eradicate poverty all over the globe.

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Jul 27, 2024

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coherence

Make sure your paragraphs are clearly separated and follow a logical order. It's important to clearly link your ideas from one paragraph to another.

structure

Your introduction and conclusion should summarize your main points more clearly and connect back to the main argument.

content

Add more specific examples and details to support your points. For instance, use more data or stories to show the impact of help on poor communities.

strength

You have a clear opinion and express it well in your introduction. Your stance on the topic is evident from the beginning.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

275 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

global interconnectivity
international cooperation
ethics
moral obligation
geographical borders
diplomatic relations
economic stability
global security
resource allocation
expertise
international aid
dependency and development
sustainable solutions
local and global initiatives
community resilience

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We cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people say that in order to be happy, you must have a job you love doing. Others say that other factors are more important Do you think that people can only be happy if they have a job they really enjoy?

Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think is a positive or negative development?

The world is consuming natural resources faster than they can be renewed. Therefore, it is important that products are made to last. Governments should discourage people from constantly buying more up to date or fashionable products. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

International tourism has brought enormous benefit to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the environment. Do the disadvantages of international tourism outweigh the advantages?