Some companies sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good, while others think there are disadvantages to this. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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It is generally claimed that nowadays more and more firms are backers of some
sports
teams
or athletes.
While
some people believe that it can bring lots of advantages for both
teams
and
companies
, others do not agree with
this
idea
. I personally agree with the
idea
that
companies
should be assisting
sports
. There are a number of strong arguments to support the
idea
that some firms should sponsor
sports
because it can bring lots of benefits for both parties. When
companies
support
sports
teams
, not only can they improve their influence, but
also
sports
teams
can achieve more success.
For instance
,
teams
can get more professional coaching staff and athletes if more financial help is injected through sponsorship.
As a result
,
companies
should invest money in
sports
teams
because it can bring lots of benefits, which can be a win-win situation for all involved.
On the other hand
, there are some important reasons to agree with the
idea
that some
companies
cannot fit the criteria of ethical practices.
Teams
should care about supporting themselves and they should carefully consider choosing the right company.
For example
,
besides
being unethical in their business practices towards the environment, humans, animals and plants, a lot of
companies
produce air pollution which contributes to global warming.
Consequently
,
teams
cannot accept all offers for sponsors and they should be careful. In conclusion,
sports
sponsorship is essential
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
a team’s success because
they
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
to improve
sports
. When
sports
teams
are supported financially, they can attract new athletes and individual players.
This
is the most important way that may develop the future of
sports
.
Submitted by hsmkashi on

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Introduction
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Body Paragraphs
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Coherence & Cohesion
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Examples
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Conclusion
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Task Response
You presented a clear opinion and discussed both sides of the argument, demonstrating an understanding of the task.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your paragraphs are well-organized, each focusing on a single main idea, which helps with the essay's overall structure.
Language
You made a good attempt to use a range of sentence structures, enhancing the readability of your essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Sports sponsorship
  • financial support
  • athletes
  • brand visibility
  • awareness
  • commercialization
  • integrity
  • dependencies
  • corporate funds
  • unethical practices
  • strategic partnerships
  • communal relations
  • promote healthy lifestyles
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