Modern people mostly stay at home rather than going outdoors. What are the reasons for this trend? Is this trend good or bad?

#people #home #trend

this

modern world, there is a divisive opinion in society. Where some folks believe that

stay

Wrong verb form

staying

show examples

at home is

Change the word

apply

show examples

better,

while

others oppose that going outdoors would be more

benefical

Correct your spelling

beneficial

Personally

Add a comma

Personally,

show examples

I strongly

anvocate

Correct your spelling

advocate

for the letter, despite there is merit in the argument that going outdoors has numerous benefits that

stay

Wrong verb form

staying

show examples

house

Add an article

the house

show examples

Along with

this

essay

Add a comma

essay,

show examples

I am going to discuss both

view points

Correct your spelling

viewpoints

show examples

before arriving at the conclusion.

To begin

with, It is essential to underscore that

hangout

Correct your spelling

hanging out

show examples

outdoors has a lot of benefits. In my perspective,

people

who are doing a large number of activities in the field

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

will gain

many

Correct quantifier usage

show examples

experience than

outhers

Correct your spelling

others

other

people

who never

doing

Wrong verb form

done

show examples

activities outside

area

Correct article usage

the area

show examples

For instance

, older

people

who

was

Verb problem

have

show examples

working

Wrong verb form

worked

show examples

long

Change the article

a long

show examples

time and have a lot of

experiance

Correct your spelling

experience

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

can solve

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

problems fastly than

yout

Correct your spelling

young

people

Moreover

, going outdoors can help

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

show examples

to develop their

knowlege

Correct your spelling

knowledge

and create great

connection

Fix the agreement mistake

connections

show examples

with other

people

. Eventually, it is useful for their

live

Replace the word

lives

show examples

due to

they could

lern

Correct your spelling

learn

new things and more realize about social

live

Replace the word

life

show examples

However

, several

people

oppose

stay

Wrong verb form

staying

show examples

at home would be more

benefical

Correct your spelling

beneficial

, it

is happen

Change the verb form

is happening

show examples

Change preposition

for

show examples

several reasons.

Firstly

, they assume that

stay

Wrong verb form

staying

show examples

at house has some advantages

such

as they will have

many

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

time with their family and from

economic

Correct article usage

an economic

show examples

aspect they can

saving

Wrong verb form

save

show examples

a lot of

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

money because they

Verb problem

do not

show examples

need

spent

Verb problem

to spend

show examples

cost to

going

Wrong verb form

show examples

outdoors.

Secondly

, for

introvert

Fix the agreement mistake

introverts

show examples

person

stay

Wrong verb form

staying

show examples

at home

become

Correct subject-verb agreement

becomes

show examples

the best choice as they

not

Change the verb form

do not

did not

show examples

have many

interact

Replace the word

interactions

show examples

with

others

Correct quantifier usage

other

show examples

people

. In conclusion, going outdoors become

positive

Add an article

a positive

the positive

show examples

trend for

millenial

Correct your spelling

millennial

generations as

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

activities can assist them to enhance their ability in many aspects.

Submitted by patricius.yohanes on Thu May 09 2024

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Coherence & Cohesion

Try to present your ideas more clearly by organizing them into distinct paragraphs, each focusing on a specific argument or point of view. This aids in readability and ensures logical flow.

Task Achievement

Enhance the clarity of your main points by supporting them with more specific examples or evidence. This strengthens your arguments and makes them more convincing to the reader.

Coherence & Cohesion

Pay attention to spelling, grammar, and punctuation. Reviewing these areas can significantly improve the quality and clarity of your writing.

Task Achievement

Your essay addresses the topic and provides a conclusion that reflects on the points discussed.

Task Achievement

You successfully bring up several arguments for both viewpoints, which showcases your ability to engage with diverse perspectives.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
49Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

280 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Modern people mostly stay at home rather than going outdoors. What are the reasons for this trend? Is this trend good or bad?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important for students to understand ideas and concepts than it is for them to learn facts.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

Some people think that the best way to be successful in life is to get a university education. Others disagree and say this is no longer true.

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara Desert or the Antarcric. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourits who visit such places?