In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
Cutting-edge opportunities in the cities have led to a higher rate of migration from the outskirts to the urban areas. Many people argue the positive impacts of relocation,
however
, I partially agree and there are some drawbacks that should be considered. In Linking Words
this
essay, I will explain my reasons in detail.
To start with, Linking Words
it is clear that
the principal branches of the top universities Linking Words
as well as
some highly recognized industries are located in the main cities. One of the reasons is that The Government has financially supported their development in order to create a megalopolis and increase foreign investments. Linking Words
This
means that since the most crucial advancements are in the urban Linking Words
regions
, Use synonyms
such
as research, technological gadgets, etc, people desire to leave those rural zones where they were raised and enter into the most competitive zones. Linking Words
For example
, New York is an emblematic and multicultural city in which many adults reach their personal and ambitious targets.
Linking Words
Conversely
, the countryside has been suffering from scarcity and poverty. Linking Words
This
means that farms and agricultural Linking Words
regions
are not receiving enough support, and nowadays, most of them have been considered as derelict areas. Use synonyms
However
, humankind is not taking into account the importance of supporting those Linking Words
regions
not only because of their crucial impact on the environment but Use synonyms
also
their goods, namely fruits and vegetables, that give humans nutrients, vitamins, and minerals. Linking Words
For example
, in Colombia, most of the farmers that cultivate and harvest their own merchandise, have begged for donations in order to maintain their products.
Linking Words
To sum up
, the government should recognize the vital role of both Linking Words
regions
and support them equally, in order to enhance both fields. Use synonyms
Besides
, green zones and their maintenance will be crucial mainly because of the environmental contamination.Linking Words
Submitted by luciaagudelomotta on
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Coherence & Cohesion
It's great to see your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. To further enhance your work, try to ensure transitional phrases seamlessly connect your ideas.
Task Achievement
You've done well in supporting your main points with examples. Consider diversifying your examples to cover a broader spectrum of impacts for an even stronger argument.
Task Achievement
To improve task achievement, make sure your position is consistently clear throughout the essay. It's beneficial to reiterate your viewpoint in the conclusion for maximum impact.
Task Achievement
Your essay provides a balanced view by discussing both the positive and negative aspects of rural to urban migration, which is excellent for task response.
Coherence & Cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is commendable, with a clear division between introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
Task Achievement
The use of specific examples, such as New York and Colombia, makes your argument more persuasive and grounded in reality.