With the increasing use and development of new technology, many machine are new able to do the work which people used to perform. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In the contemporary world, the rapid development of technology has infiltrated almost all aspects of our lives, entirely revolutionizing certain industries by automating and digitalizing them. Resultantly, a multitude of professionals have been superseded by robots. It is my contention that technology is a multifaceted phenomenon with merits and demerits simultaneously.
To begin
with, technological advancements have been playing an indispensable part in the massive transformation of manufacturing industries. To exemplify
this
statement, over the
last
century, the production capacity of plants increased drastically
due to
the substitution of the human workforce with machine power which is relatively faster, cheap to run and sustainable as compared to other alternatives.
Consequently
, these advancements brought about the parallel improvement of other industries, one feeding the other perpetually in order to make
this
world a sufficient place to live.
Furthermore
, another advantage of
this
technological takeover is that
machines
are renowned for their ability to produce many materials with almost zero blemishes, a feat
that is
often unattainable with human incorporation. Companies like Toyota and Amazon have replaced a huge number of their employees with robots with high production throughput to reach their heydays. Whilst their production capacity increased by almost tenfold, the quality errors have gone down to zero, offsetting their investment costs under the first two years.
On the contrary
, though many conglomerates derive massive benefits through exploiting the advantages of machinery,
this
trend has
also
a downgrading impact on humanity. It is evident that if
this
propensity to replace humans with
machines
continues
further
on, presumably a big majority of the human population will be unemployed,
thus
, leading to a modern catastrophe which cannot be undone. Undoubtedly,
this
magnitude of an event will cause many financial crises to break out, eventually derailing the entire economy. In conclusion, despite the fact that the risk of an economic downturn is imminent if business owners keep substituting their employees with
machines
, the salient benefits of
machines
over humans outweigh its drawbacks.
Submitted by orkhanshamil on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure a clear thesis statement in your introduction to guide the reader through your argument.
task achievement
Develop both sides of the argument evenly to provide a balanced view before concluding.
coherence cohesion
Maintain a clear and logical flow of ideas by carefully planning paragraphs around key points.
coherence cohesion
Use a variety of linking phrases to improve the cohesion between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Providing specific examples such as Toyota and Amazon to illustrate your points.
coherence cohesion
Effective use of introductory and concluding paragraphs to frame your argument.
coherence cohesion
The logical progression from the advantages to the disadvantages of technology in the workplace.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: