Not enough people realise the importance of natural world. What is the reason for people’s lack of awareness? How can people be made more aware?

Most
people
have
yet
Rephrase
not yet
show examples
realized the
essential
Fix the agreement mistake
essentials
show examples
of
world
Add an article
the world
show examples
of nature.
This
essay will
dicuss
Correct your spelling
discuss
the reason for
people
's empty-headedness and the
adresses
Correct your spelling
addresses
to make
people
become more aware. First of all, in many countries,
people
tend to
prioritze
Correct your spelling
prioritise
economic growth and technological development over environmental preservation, forgetting the crucial role the natural world plays in human life.
For instance
, in Viet Nam, many
people
in remote areas live on selling wood from cutting down trees,
Correct pronoun usage
which lead
show examples
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
to soil erosion and
also
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
show examples
flood
Wrong verb form
flooding
show examples
more easily because there are no trees in the area to prevent the flood.
In addition
,
people
too
Replace the word
to
show examples
care about themselves
that
Change preposition
by
show examples
doing harm to the environment unintentionally.
For example
, mature prefer going to work by their personal vehicle to
going
Change the form of the verb
go
show examples
to work by using public transport.
This
sounds harmless but the more
people
use their own car to work, the more
vehicle
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
show examples
appear on the road leading to the increase in carbon emission.
Submitted by vananhdo168 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Completion
Expand your essay to discuss ways in which people's awareness about the importance of the natural world can be increased. This part of the question was not fully addressed.
Introduction
Ensure your introduction clearly outlines the main points that will be discussed in the essay for a stronger start.
Grammar and Vocabulary
Be mindful of grammatical errors and aim to use a wider range of vocabulary for more precise expression.
Example Elaboration
Try to discuss the provided examples in more depth, elaborating on how they illustrate the issue at hand.
Idea Connection
Connected ideas and examples effectively, demonstrating a good understanding of the topic.
Logical Structure
Structured paragraphs in a logical manner, making the argument easy to follow.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental conservation
  • technological advancements
  • economic growth
  • overwhelming flow of information
  • sensational news topics
  • environmental education
  • media campaigns
  • environmental degradation
  • core curriculum
  • social media influencers
  • non-governmental organizations (NGOs)
  • community projects
  • hands-on involvement
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!