Nowadays, more and more children acquire unhealthy eating habits. Why is this happening? What can be done to solve this issue?
There is an ongoing debate surrounding
children
these days eating more unhealthy foods
. From this
writer's perspective, the core reason for this
issue is the prevalence of fast snack consumption
whereas
the problem can be reduced by governments putting higher taxes
on sugar, fat, and high-calorie junk
food
.
The initial reason for the increasing consumption
of unhealthy products in children
's diets is the popularity of junk
food
in fast-paced societies. In other words
, commercial breaks on televisions or pop-up ads on the Internet usually advertise discounts on fast food
at restaurants or the fast and convenient delivery service of those to the viewers. This
situation leads to children
begging their parents for junk
snack
despite how unhealthy they are. Fix the agreement mistake
snacks
Therefore
, the rise of fast food
popularity among children
contributes to the high consumption
of these products.
This
problem, however
, can be alleviated by the implementation of high taxes
on different unhealthy factors in foods
such
as sugar or ingredients containing large proportions of fat. To clarify, by applying this
regulation, authorities can lower the consumption
of junk
foods
because parents will consider the high price of them and are not likely to buy those foods
for their children
. To annotate the point, consider the UK where governments force supermarkets to pay higher taxes
for carbohydrate
leading to the expensive cost of sugary drinks, Fix the agreement mistake
carbohydrates
thus
, parents do not purchase those making their children
consume less carbohydrate
.
In conclusion, the root cause of Fix the agreement mistake
carbohydrates
children
's high consumption
of unhealthy food
stems from the popularity of fast food
in modern days. Nevertheless
, it can be mitigated by governments applying high rates of taxes
on sugary and high-fat foods
.Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on
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coherence cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures more to enhance readability and flow. While your essay is well-organized, a greater variety of sentence types can make your arguments even more engaging.
task achievement
To solidify your argument, include more specific examples or data. Your use of the UK as an example is effective, but additional examples could provide stronger support for your points.
coherence cohesion
You provided a clear and coherent structure, with a distinguishable introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which effectively guides the reader through your arguments.
task achievement
You successfully identified the problem and proposed a viable solution, demonstrating a strong understanding of the task requirements.
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