Nowadays consumer goods have become the most important part of people’s lives. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Evidence suggests that buying products is a growing trend and is
a
Change the article
an
show examples
undeniable part of everyone in their daily life.
Although
there are a number of benefits involved in
this
approach, the drawbacks are by no means negligible. On the plus side. there are some advantages in purchasing a wide range of
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
for
people
.
To begin
with, it brings prosperity. simply put, in
this
hectic pace of life most of the society do not have enough time or opportunity to provide
their
Change preposition
for their
show examples
needs so buying them is the only logical
choise
Correct your spelling
choice
choose
to
do
Verb problem
make
show examples
.
For example
, most of the public do not have time and access to
farm lands
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farmlands
show examples
in order to cultivate their own food and it is easier to buy them from a grocery store.
Furthermore
, it
creats
Correct your spelling
creates
entrpreneurship
Correct your spelling
entrepreneurship
.
That is
, to provide and prepare products a significant amount of workforce is needed which
this
need leads to more job opportunities for citizens. Many companies and
manufactures
Correct your spelling
manufacturers
show examples
have appeared
due to
this
trend and many workers are occupied with a decent job in these places.
However
, the downside cannot be ignored. The most axiomatic argument is concerned with the environmental impact of
this
practic
Correct your spelling
practice
show examples
.
That is
to say, companies consume a huge amount of
fules
Correct your spelling
fuel
such
as electricity, gas and oil and use them to provide
necessary
Add an article
the necessary
show examples
energy for their devices which causes releasing more carbon dioxide into the air and most of their residue is abandoned in the
envitonment
Correct your spelling
environment
or the sea.
On the other hand
, consuming culture
Add a missing verb
is prevalents
show examples
prevalents
Correct your spelling
prevalent
prevalence
more than ever.
people
's
toughts
Correct your spelling
thoughts
are manipulated by plenty of advertising to be convinced that they want to buy something that they do not really need.
For instance
, having a closet full of various clothes is
essentioal
Correct your spelling
essential
for
people
who
are believed
Wrong verb form
believe
show examples
this
is the value of their life.
To conclude
, consumer culture can be both rewarding and problematic.
While
this
trend may help nations to access their vital needs immediately and provide job opportunities, it is highly likely that
this
phenomenon harms
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
and cultivates false ideas in
people
's minds
Submitted by m.tavasoli18 on

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Grammar & Vocabulary
Review the essay for minor grammatical errors and typos to enhance clarity.
Coherence & Cohesion
Try to use a wider range of linking words for smoother transitions between ideas.
Task Response
Consider refining the introduction and conclusion to more clearly state your viewpoint on whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
Task Response
Effectively addresses both advantages and disadvantages of the topic.
Task Achievement
Uses examples well to support main points.
Coherence & Cohesion
Maintains a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Your opinion

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • mass production
  • consumerism
  • economic growth
  • environmental degradation
  • natural resources
  • overconsumption
  • waste management
  • landfill
  • social inequality
  • materialism
  • financial strain
  • mental well-being
  • quality of life
  • job creation
  • productivity
  • pollution
  • deforestation
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