Some people believe that social media sites, such as Facebook or Twitter, have a negative impact on young people and their ability to form personal relationships. Others believe that these sites bring people together in

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In recent years, social
media
and its effects on
people
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
been one of the most discussed topics worldwide. The reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
lies
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
the fact that online
platforms
being developed have been acting as revolutionary steps in broadening man's vision
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
how we share information and communicate with each other. There
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
been two growing consensuses where one supports that online
sites
like Facebook and Twitter influence young
people
badly and worsen their capability of forming and maintaining personal links
while
the other argues that they bring
people
closer authentically.
This
writer concurs with the latter as closer contact with relatives and more
opportunites
Correct your spelling
opportunities
to acquaint new friends are all attributed to the birth of so imperative applications. It is pivotal that
users
realize that
such
sites
like Facebook or
Youtube
Correct your spelling
YouTube
show examples
help
people
have closer contact with their
beloved
Correct your spelling
loved
show examples
ones. What unlocks way more access to someone's posts, shares and communication with them than ever before is
sites
' instant developments within more modes and functions available, with some powered by AI. Thanks to these remarkable changes,
users
can chat or share good moments with others, particularly their families and relatives in far
distance
Fix the agreement mistake
distances
show examples
within just a touch. There has been a credible point in which teenagers and their ability to grow relationships may deteriorate because of social
media
platforms
. Lack of surveillance, early technology adaptation,
access
Correct word choice
and access
show examples
to incongruous sources of information are major causes of
this
multifaceted problem, which lead to concerningly massive increases in young
users
' transgressive misbehaviours, even juvenile delinquents can be probably impregnated
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
these websites.
However
,
this
can be solved by many solutions. Stricter regulations and policies, wider instructing programmes,
more
Correct word choice
and more
show examples
parental monitoring act as strong deterrents to prevent the youth from being objectionable.
This
writer asserts that online
platforms
don't just cement personal bonds, but
also
expand to more new relationships with new
people
.
This
is beneficial in many ways.
For instance
,
acquainting
Verb problem
acquiring
show examples
more friends means exploring different characters,
perspectives
Correct word choice
and perspectives
show examples
, or in terms of work, getting more chances
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
prestigious career success, special offers, deals, and so on.
While
heavy utilisation of social
media
platforms
can be malicious to a large portion of
users
, the advantages outweigh the drawbacks. Though online
sites
may bring unforeseen dangers,
listed
Correct article usage
the listed
show examples
benefits are long-lasting and durable for
our
Change the word
the
show examples
near future.
Therefore
, it is agreed that human beings exploit much from social
media
channels
Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction
Ensure a clear introduction that outlines your position and previews the main points. Your introduction sets the stage but could be more explicit about the essay's direction.
Paragraphing
Work on paragraphing to ensure each idea is fully developed and logically sequenced. This enhances the readability and flow of your essay.
Linking words
Incorporate a variety of linking words to better connect ideas and paragraphs. While present, further diversification can aid in seamless reading.
Balanced view
Balance the essay by elaborating more on how social media can negatively impact young people. You've mentioned it briefly; expanding this point would strengthen your argument.
Supporting examples
Include more specific examples and evidence to support your arguments. Real-world examples, statistics, or studies add credibility and depth to your claims.
Critical engagement
Your essay acknowledges both sides of the argument, which shows critical thinking.
Conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes your stance, reinforcing your argument's strength.
Vocabulary
You have a good range of vocabulary relevant to the topic, enhancing the quality of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: