Topic: The graph shows the percentage of the Australian workforce in in five industries between 1962 and 2012.

Topic: The graph shows the percentage of the Australian workforce in in five industries between 1962 and 2012.
The supplied line graph illustrates the proportion of
Australian
Correct article usage
the Australian
show examples
population who
works
Wrong verb form
worked
show examples
for 5 industries
during
Change preposition
from
show examples
1962 till 2012.
Overall
, the line graph includes
workforce
Correct article usage
the workforce
show examples
in services, construction and mining with
uptrend
Correct article usage
an uptrend
show examples
while
three other sections
such
as manufacturing and agriculture with downtrend. The noticeable change occurred in services and it started from 52% in 1962 and reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
78% in 2012.
Moreover
, the mining workforce was 2% in the first year, and it slightly increased to approximately 5% in the
last
year.
Likewise
, construction experienced the same pattern with 9% to 11% in 1962 and 2012 respectively.
Additionally
, manufacturing workers were 25% and it remained flat until 1972, but went continuously down during the years and reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
10% in 2012.
Furthermore
, people who work in agriculture were 11% of
Australian
Correct article usage
the Australian
show examples
workforce at first and the
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
of them
was fluctuated
Change to the active voice
fluctuated
has fluctuated
show examples
, and
finally
Add a comma
finally,
show examples
it became to near 6% in 2012.
Submitted by abhari1997 on

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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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