The only reason why people work hard is to earn money and there is no another reason for doing so. To what extent do you agree and disagree ?
Nowadays, we are living in the
advents
of new high-tech, and working hard is a vital factor that improves social life. Some people consider that only when you work as a bee can you have bread and butter Correct your spelling
advances
while
others think there are other reasons for doing so. In this
essay, I will discuss the rationales behind these two views before showing why I favor
the latter statement.
Change the spelling
favour
To begin
with, the element of working hard increases the income of individuals with the goal spent on costs for personal or family. For illustrate, when a nation focuses on jobs that earn cash, the citizens are capable of taking good care of their families. They need money to meet the basic demands in life when meeting a friend, paying house bills, and shopping. In addition
, citizens have higher salaries, who will save huge sums of money based on financial planning, and they can be used for urgent circumstances. Therefore
, working hard not only creates a source of income but also
arouses the motivation of the public, improves mental health, and raises spending management aptitude.
Regarding the ideal goals of those who do not desire a task that attracts coins, they can grow talent and dedication to the community. In an extreme instance, composers always live in passion and are conscientious about creating a script or song to serve the audiences. Plus, songs offer a healing effect. Once the audiences appreciate the songs, the composers can enjoy the rewarding moments of being recognized. Another illustration to discuss is that soldiers have always been covering the country, bringing peace to citizens. They are also
committed to a significant mission. In return, ordinary people are supposed to be in charge of working hard for society, contributing to building the country from the inside.
From the viewpoints mentioned above, I recognize money, and device a job in society so vital. Furthermore
, each person will have their orientation and follow a dream of creating and fulfilling the perceptual missions when being part of life and the country.Submitted by jakelong16091994 on
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General
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You have effectively provided a balanced discussion on the topic, presenting views on both sides before stating your own position, which demonstrates a good understanding of the task requirements.
Coherence and Cohesion
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Content Quality
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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