In many places today, rapid lifestyle changes are affecting family relationships. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Bonding family relationships has always played a significant role in human lives.
However
,
people
's lives have
met
Verb problem
experienced
show examples
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
excessive change
due to
the rapid development in multiple areas. In my opinion, to some extent, the advantages ideed surpass the disadvantages in
this
trend. The notion is that gathering time with families might be deprived by advanced electronic devices,
such
as smartphones, video games and social media.
While
it's true that a high proportion of teenagers immers themselves in the unreal world during the family reunion, there are benefits if they enjoy the devices through different methods.
For instance
, family members can participate in a group game with young children, which allows a deeper comprehension of what the young generation is obsessed with and afterwards creates more harmonious relationships.
Moreover
, rapid transportation offers effective commuting choices for
people
who live far apart from their families. Though some of the families may not meet quite often
due to
the long distance, physical approaches like high-speed rails can truly improve the disadvantage.
Besides
, since remote working has become a popular working style in modern society, it provides enormous flexibility
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
people
. Individuals are able to replace their commuting time with family gatherings,
while
the deep bond with the
people
they love is the most valuable meaning that most
people
aspire
.
Change preposition
to.
show examples
In conclusion, despite the debates between the advantages and disadvantages caused by the rapid lifestyle, I believe the advantages outweigh the other. As long as
people
apply approaches based on consideration and love,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
family relationships can improve
further
.
Submitted by vsunnloe147 on

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Enhancement
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Relevance
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Structure
The essay is well-structured, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which aids in understanding and engagement.
Task Response
You have effectively addressed the essay question, presenting a balanced view with support for your opinion.
Examples
Your use of examples, like family playing group games and the mention of high-speed rails, brings life to your arguments, despite the need for more specificity.

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