some people believe that professionals such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe that they should be free to work in another country if they wish. discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Whether or not professionals should pursue their
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
where they
completed
Wrong verb form
complete
show examples
their studies is a debatable matter.
While
some say that it should be obligatory to do so, others and I adhere to the belief that it is logical to let them choose themselves. It is beneficial for countries to have a large number of well-trained workforce available when necessary;
therefore
, they entice the graduates into working for them at any cost.
Moreover
, in the case of developing countries where the economy is moderately turbulent, having
highly-qualified
Correct your spelling
highly qualified
show examples
individuals is a must in order to thrive.
Furthermore
, there are some courses that are provided for students with zero cost which implements a sense of responsibility in graduates for that country. A recent study demonstrates that more than half of the post-graduates tend to work in the same place that they went to school
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
.
On the other hand
, the freedom of choice is one the most honored needs of mankind which would make the decision of working in another location valid.
Consequently
, trained workers are seeking
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the best options to meet their needs despite the location since they are offered
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
acceptable incomes and advanced living circumstances
due to
their skills. Another factor that plays a
crusial
Correct your spelling
crucial
role is how well they would be respected in different communities. Take
iranian
Change the capitalization
Iranian
show examples
doctors as an example;
eventhough
Correct your spelling
even though
they are now being offered a lot more money to work in their own country, they are determined to leave because of how badly citizens treat them. In a nutshell,
although
a segment of society believes that to work where you study is supposed to be mandatory, others prefer to leave the choice to those who are making them. I tend to side with the second group
due to
the reasons that are elaborated in
this
essay.
Submitted by bita.rezaei7052 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

specific examples
Ensure that all ideas are fully developed with specific examples. For instance, provide more detailed examples or statistics regarding countries offering education for free and how this influences professionals' sense of duty.
clear comprehensive ideas
Clarify some vague points. For example, when talking about trained workers seeking better options, provide concrete examples. This will make your argument more convincing and clear.
complete response
Overall, the essay addresses the task effectively, discussing both viewpoints and providing a personal opinion, which demonstrates a good understanding of the prompt.
logical structure
The essay has a logical structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. This aids in the reader’s understanding and keeps them engaged throughout.
supported main points
Main points are supported with explanations and some examples, which helps in reinforcing the argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • professionals
  • doctors
  • engineers
  • required
  • training
  • home country
  • cultural
  • linguistic
  • advantages
  • economic impact
  • free
  • another country
  • globalization
  • international collaboration
  • improving
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • experience
  • opinion
What to do next:
Look at other essays: