Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Modern transportation and shipping has made the world a better place to live. Use specific reasons and details to explain your opinion.
Nowadays, the development of
transportation
and shipping has increased our life quality significantly. This
essay agrees with this
statement because this
advancement has a positive impact on the tourism industry and countries
' economies.
Advanced transport options have made international travel more affordable and accessible, a
growing number of tourists has lots of benefits for the public. Modern Correct word choice
and a
transportation
systems such
as airplanes
and high-speed trains reduce travel time and allow people to connect with each other easily. Change the spelling
aeroplanes
For example
, in the past people were not able to visit other countries
for a short time.Moreover
, by increasing the number of public transportation
vehicles the cost of tickets drop
, so more individuals are able to afford a trip and travel to other Correct subject-verb agreement
drops
country
or Fix the agreement mistake
countries
city
as Fix the agreement mistake
cities
a
Correct article usage
apply
tourist
in order to get familiar Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
to
other cultures and traditions.
Modern shipping systems have grown the nations' economies noticeably. Change preposition
with
To begin
with, by exporting and importing goods through
sea or air Change preposition
by
countries
are able to sell their local products, in consequence of rising potential international customers the manufactures
have to hire more employees in order to speed up their production process. Correct your spelling
manufacturers
Furthermore
, some nations, who
have modern and powerful industries, could invest in their specific product and manufacture Correct pronoun usage
that
it
globally. Correct pronoun usage
them
For example
, Korean
vehicle industry sends its modern car to European Correct article usage
the Korean
countries
by enormous ship
and improves its economy.
In conclusion, the progress in Fix the agreement mistake
ships
transportation
and shipping not only improves people's lives but also
grows the nation's finances. In my opinion, these advancement has positive impacts for everyone.Submitted by Negar_seddigh on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Work on ensuring that each paragraph is focused on a single main idea, and avoid mixing different points in one paragraph. For instance, the first paragraph discusses both tourism and affordability—consider splitting these into distinct points.
task achievement
Pay close attention to the clarity of ideas. For example, the sentence about people not being able to visit other countries for a short time in the past is somewhat vague. Be specific about how modern transportation has changed this.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
task achievement
Relevant and specific examples, such as the Korean vehicle industry, effectively support the arguments.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?