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Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

There is no doubt that globalisation has benefited the world by bringing together people, business and nations. People who criticise it stand in the way of progress. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#doubt #globalisation #world #people #business #nations #criticise #progress
Nowadays, the advancements
due to
 globalisation
is
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are
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 becoming
an
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an overall aspect
overall aspects
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overall
 aspects in all
region
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regions
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 of the
world
. There are no doubts that the
word
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world
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 is benefiting from
globlalisation
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globalisation
globalization
 as
this
 brings the
world
 and people together.
On the other hand
, some
poeple
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people
 are not sure yet about the effects of
globlisation
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globalisation
globalization
. Through
this
 essay we will look at the pros and cons
globlisation
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globalisation
globalization
have
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has
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 on our globe. First and foremost,
globlisation
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globalisation
globalization
 has
a
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apply
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knock-on effects on our
world
especially
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, especially
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 during the period of covid pandemic. To give a clear example, the use of
zoom
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Zoom
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 meetings during covid lockdown by business owners from different regions around the
world
 and the use of it by the majority of educational
intitustions
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institutions
 has eased the way of communication and learning.
For instance
,
also
reserach
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research
 published during covid has participated in finding out new methods and techniques in
traeting
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treating
 and preventing
this
 disease.
Secondly
, problems that may face the
world
due to
globlisation
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globalisation
globalization
is
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are
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 the different cultures and
background
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backgrounds
show examples
 that it may expose to young adults. Changing the way they think and believe
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task achievement
Your introduction sets the stage well but needs to be clearer. Ensure that your thesis explicitly states your position on the topic, not just mentioning 'pros and cons'.
task achievement
Try to dive deeper into the cons of globalization and balance your argument by discussing both perspectives adequately.
coherence cohesion
A more structured organization of your main points would aid in clarity. For example, start with topic sentences that clearly state the main point of the paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to include a conclusion summarizing the key points and restating your position to enhance the cohesion of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Use linking words and phrases more effectively to connect your ideas and ensure a smooth flow between sentences and paragraphs.
relevant specific examples
You provide relevant examples like Zoom meetings and research shared during the COVID pandemic, which add depth to your discussion.
task achievement
The essay demonstrates a good understanding of how globalization has practically impacted the world, especially in times of crisis like the COVID pandemic.
task achievement
Your essay displays an attempt to consider both sides of the argument, which adds balance.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • international trade
  • cultural homogenization
  • multinational corporations
  • sustainable development
  • economic disparities
  • technological advancement
  • cultural exchange
  • scrutinize
  • ethics
  • innovation
  • connectivity
  • protectionism
  • outsourcing
  • free market
  • trade liberalization
What to do next:
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