In many countries today, the eating habits and lifestyle of children are diffrent from those of previous generations. Some people say this has had a negative effect on their health. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some
Change preposition
In some
show examples
countries and governments nowadays,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
junk
food
became
Wrong verb form
has become
show examples
routine and habits in our life of people
in particular
children are different from those of
improve
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improved
show examples
generations.
To begin
, as we can observe
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
in modern days, almost
countries
Correct determiner usage
all countries
show examples
suffer
of
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from
show examples
this
issue. I would discuss
before
Correct pronoun usage
this before
show examples
reaching my opinion. First of all, eating habits
the
Add a missing verb
are the
show examples
most popular problem in those days
furthermore
, it
assets
Correct your spelling
assists
show examples
to increase
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in increasing
show examples
diseases in order to junk
food
has a lot of calories and sugar as Hamburger and Pizza . Instance, a new business
provide
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provides
show examples
a lot of restaurants to invest in their country.
Secondly
, there
are
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is
show examples
a negative effect
in
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on
show examples
our life because fast
food
become the best choice recently. In that case, technology allowed all humans to order
the
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apply
show examples
food
online in the same way,
it
Correct word choice
and it
show examples
encouraged all
business
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businesses
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to opine new restaurant or service
solution
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solutions
show examples
as
app
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apps
show examples
or order online ! As follows: people
used
Wrong verb form
use
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smart phone
Correct your spelling
smartphones
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almost
day
Correct determiner usage
every day
show examples
during the time they
noticeable
Replace the word
notice
show examples
to search
about
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for
show examples
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
restaurant
Fix the agreement mistake
restaurants
show examples
or what the best saler in those days ? For that reason, the governments have to lead their generations to increase
aware
Replace the word
awareness
show examples
about health and
unhealth
Correct your spelling
unhealthy
show examples
food
. In my point of view, I totally agree with
essay
Correct article usage
the essay
show examples
because when I go outside to have
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
fun with my family I
appear
Verb problem
see
show examples
that there are
Add an article
the restaurant
show examples
restaurant
Fix the agreement mistake
restaurants
show examples
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
fast
food
and all their clients are over
weait
Correct your spelling
there
that's why I
don
Correct your spelling
do
show examples
not prefer the choice when I go . I realise that in
golden
Correct article usage
the golden
show examples
age we faced some
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
from
Change preposition
with
show examples
eating habits.
To sum up
, the governments look at
solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
show examples
to resolve fast
food
or junk
food
thus
to develop quality of life.
Submitted by nahlaalrashidi on

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introduction conclusion
The introduction should clearly state the topic and your stance on it. Try to clearly define what the essay will discuss.
relevant specific examples
Try to support your points with more specific examples or data. This will strengthen your argument and make it more convincing.
logical structure
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and supports the overall argument. Avoid jumping between points, making sure to fully develop each one before moving to the next.
supported main points
You have made a commendable effort to discuss multiple aspects of the issue. This shows that you can approach a topic from different angles.
introduction conclusion
The conclusion does summarize your key points and gives a final opinion which is good practice.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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