Today more and more people want things instantly. why is this? Is it positive or negative development?
Nowadays, people's demand for immediate access to things is rapidly increasing.
This
phenomenon caused
by the development of transmission and transportation technologies. Personally, I believe that Add a missing verb
is caused
this
is a negative trend that is
going to badly affect humankind.
After the
invention of the internet, which cut out the time needed to communicate and Change preposition
The
recieve
information, Correct your spelling
receive
bring
back Wrong verb form
brought
the
improvements in everything else, including transmitting and transporting systems. Unlike before, you may have needed days or even years to connect with your overseas friends, now you only need a second or even Correct article usage
apply
miliseconds
to talk about how your day was with them. Our goods are Correct your spelling
milliseconds
also
being delivered at a monstrous speed now, which only takes a few days to a few months as
the latest, compared to the past, which took ages. Change preposition
at
Consequently
, the advancement is so good that we greedily ask for more.
This
is clearly an extremely bad trend; humans are so dependent on convenience. As a result
, people are becoming more and more impatient, bad-tempered, and ungrateful; they request less and less time to receive their order
and are intolerant of any waiting. These things undeniably negatively impact on the Fix the agreement mistake
orders
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
themsleves
. Which can result in intense social problems Correct your spelling
themselves
such
as strike
at work, mental health Fix the agreement mistake
strikes
issue
, Fix the agreement mistake
issues
dissastisfaction
of life quality and more.
In conclusion, the tendency of people Correct your spelling
dissatisfaction
asking
immediately for everything is Change the verb form
to ask
caue
by the Correct your spelling
caused
cause
improvrment
Correct your spelling
improvement
of
Change preposition
in
technologies
. Fix the agreement mistake
technology
This
phenomenon is certainly harmful for
Change the preposition
to
Correct article usage
apply
the
society and humankind.Correct article usage
apply
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task achievement
The essay presents a clear response to the task, identifying both the reason for the trend (advancements in technology) and its perceived negative effects. However, the discussion could benefit from additional development and depth. You could provide more specific examples and explanations to support your points.
coherence cohesion
The ideas are generally logically structured, and the introduction and conclusion are present. Nevertheless, some sentences are quite long and complex, which can interrupt the flow of ideas. Breaking them into shorter, clearer sentences would enhance readability. Additionally, connecting sentences with appropriate linking words (e.g., 'therefore', 'as a result') would improve cohesion.
task achievement
The essay effectively identifies the primary reason behind the trend of wanting immediate access to things, which is the advancement in technology, specifically in communication and transportation.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present and effectively summarize the main points of the essay. This provides a clear structure for the reader.
task achievement
The essay demonstrates an understanding of the negative implications of the trend, discussing its impact on human behavior and society.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite