Some people think that children are having to much free time and this time should be use to study more. To what extent do you agree with this statement?
Many people believe that
children
these days have ample time
and this
time
should be utilized to study and improve their academic perfromance
. Correct your spelling
performance
While
there are some people who think that these children
should spend their free time
doing different activites
with their family and friends. In Correct your spelling
activities
this
essay, I will talk about if it is worthwile
for Correct your spelling
worthwhile
children
to focus on their studies or consider other social acitivities
as well.
Correct your spelling
activities
Firstly
if children
focuses
on studying in their free Change the verb form
focus
time
, there is a high chance that their academic performance will improve significantly. The additional time
can be used to work on the weaker subjects. The time
spent on the courses can help children
achieve better grades collectively.
Studying voluntarily enable
Correct subject-verb agreement
enables
children
to develop interest
Correct article usage
an interest
for
research and reading. Change preposition
in
This
can help children
in polishing
their reading skills and incorporate Wrong verb form
polish
ability
to work harder. Intensive subjects like History, Social Studies or English Literature can be dealt Add an article
the ability
easily
. Change preposition
with easily
Children
who often read books are known for having better speaking skills and vocabulary. Improved academic performance can also
leads
to better studying prospects later in the future when they apply for high school.
Change the verb form
lead
Children
should also
focus on other activites
apart from studying as well. Correct your spelling
activities
While
every parent dreams for
academic success for their child, they should Change preposition
of
also
know that other social activites
can lead to Correct your spelling
activities
a
better personality development. There is no harm if these Remove the article
apply
children
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
time
with their family
in building Fix the agreement mistake
families
bond
amongst themselves or learning a new skill like gardening or cycling. Participating in festivals can bring the people in Fix the agreement mistake
bonds
community
together enabling Add an article
the community
children
to learn more about the society, cultural and moral values.
In conclusion, studying extra will always be benificial
for Correct your spelling
beneficial
children
. Although
other social activities can help in personal development, Parents are advised to consider all aspects before making a decision on how to effectively consume additional time
for their children
.Submitted by rohan.ahmed488 on
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Grammar & Spelling
Try to minimize grammatical errors and pay attention to spelling. For example, 'perfromance' should be 'performance' and 'actvites' should be 'activities.' Proofreading can help avoid such mistakes.
Transitions & Flow
Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to maintain a natural flow. Adding some transitional phrases like 'Moreover' or 'On the other hand' can improve overall coherence.
Introduction
The introduction provides a clear overview of both perspectives, setting a strong foundation for the discussion.
Balanced Viewpoint
The essay covers both sides of the argument thoroughly, providing balanced viewpoints.
Conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main arguments, bringing the essay to a close.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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