IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows average carbon dioxide (CO) emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Sweden, ltaly and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, andmake comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows average carbon dioxide (CO) emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Sweden, ltaly and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, andmake comparisons where relevant.
The given line graph illustrates how much was emitted of
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
average
carbon
Use synonyms
dioxide
Use synonyms
 for
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
 in
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom,
Sweden
Use synonyms
, Italy and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.
Overall
Linking Words
, people in Italy and Portugal
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
experienced an
increasing
Fix the agreement mistake
increase in
show examples
of
Correct article usage
the of
show examples
 amount
emission
Fix the agreement mistake
emissions
show examples
 per individual, it is
also
Linking Words
 clear that despite some
fluctuated
Replace the word
fluctuation
show examples
 of
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom and
Sweden
Use synonyms
 were considered
decrease
Add the particle
to decrease
show examples
 around that period.
Italain
Correct your spelling
Italian
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
emitted
carbon
Use synonyms
dioxide
Use synonyms
about
Change preposition
of about
show examples
 4 metric
tonnes
Use synonyms
 to almost 8
units
Use synonyms
 between 1967 to 2007.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, from 1967 the average intake
Use synonyms
carbon
Change preposition
of carbon
show examples
dioxide
Use synonyms
 was emitted around
a metric
Correct the article-noun agreement
a metric tonne
metric tonnes
show examples
tonnes
Use synonyms
 and
insteadly
Correct your spelling
instead
 increased to 5.5 metric
Use synonyms
dioxide
Change to a plural noun
dioxides
show examples
 and remained stable until 2007. The figure for
Sweden
Use synonyms
 started in the first year
about
Change preposition
at about
show examples
 8
units
Use synonyms
 and hovered at
peak
Correct article usage
a peak
show examples
 in 1977
about
Change preposition
at about
show examples
 10
units
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 it experienced
dramatically declined
Replace the word
a dramatic decline
show examples
 in 2007 by 5 metric
tonnes
Use synonyms
. Meanwhile,
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom slowly dropped from around about 10
units
Use synonyms
 intake
carbon
Use synonyms
dioxide
Use synonyms
 per person and slowly declined
about
Change preposition
to about
show examples
 8 metric
tonnes
Use synonyms
 which
equal
Add a missing verb
was equal
show examples
 to the starting emission intake per person in
Sweden
Use synonyms
 by 1967.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words carbon, dioxide, sweden, tonnes, units with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "declined" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 5 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slowly" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • CO2 emissions
  • per capita
  • decline
  • increase
  • trend
  • comparison
  • industrial growth
  • economic development
  • green energy
  • environmental policy
  • Kyoto Protocol
  • EU regulations
  • technological advancement
  • population growth
  • international agreements
What to do next:
Look at other essays: