All parents want the best opportunities for their children. There are some people who think that schools should teach children skills but other think having a range of subject is better for a children's future.
Education and developing
skills
are crucial in a student's life. Some people argue that technical and non-technical expertise should be educated at schools while
others advocate that a variety of modules is essential for pupils' future. In this
essay, I will explore both views and assert why I opt for schools to concentrate on developing skills
.
On the one hand, all human beings expect their offspring to be well-educated, thus
they want a certain list of modules to be covered during primary and secondary level education because parents have a perception that students
who perform well in school can enter the best universities to pursue their tertiary education. For instance
, in India, students
who scored more than a certain amount of marks can be qualified for the best medical colleges.
On the other hand
, proponents of prioritizing skills
argue that expertise such
as communication, leadership, entrepreneurship, and critical thinking are not only helping to foster students
to become mature and decreasing their mental stress and encouraging them to concentrate on various things other than studying to become a successful human being. For example
, nowadays most companies prefer employees to adapt to various soft skills
although
they obtain better grades in exams.
In conclusion, while
arguments exist to prioritize a set of modules and adapt youngsters to concentrate more on developing abilities, I strongly suggest that students
must not always be learning general regular subjects and be exposed to non-technical qualities to be a better person of themselves to associate and cooperate with the competitive world.Submitted by thanushan.kulathasan on
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task achievement
Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the task and addresses both viewpoints well. However, some arguments need further development to make your stance stronger and more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Introduce more transition words and phrases to improve the logical flow of your essay. Pay attention to paragraphing; each paragraph should contain a single clear idea that supports your main argument.
introduction conclusion present
Ensure that your introduction briefly outlines the structure of your essay and that each main point is clearly linked to your final conclusion. Also, revisit the language used in your conclusion to avoid repetition and enhance coherence.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction is clear and sets the stage for the argument.
relevant specific examples
You used relevant examples that strengthened your arguments and made them more relatable.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarized the main points and reiterated your stance, providing a clear ending.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.