Write about the following topic: It is generally accepted that exercise is good for children and teenagers. Therefore, physical education and sport should be compulsory for all students in all schools. What do you think? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Exercise is important throughout
life
for all age groups in order to maintain both physical health and mental well-being. Making sports instruction and physical education mandatory for all able-bodied school students is a good idea because it establishes beneficial exercise habits and enhances other aspects of their lives.
Sport
is a great source of lessons for
life
. It teaches us to take nothing for granted and to treat others with respect. The smug individual or overconfident team is always vulnerable and may be beaten by an opponent with less obvious skill but more tenacity and determination.
Sport
teaches us how to behave, or how not to behave, in defeat. Maintaining composure in the face of disappointment is a
life
skill well worth mastering, as is the ability to recover quickly after setbacks.
Sport
teaches us concentration, discipline and a good work ethic (essential for academic achievement as well). It is only by training hard, staying focused and exercising self-control that we attain success. We learn a lot about competition but
sport
teaches us restraint, too: we need to keep a cool head in the midst of intense pressure to have a chance of winning. Being calm and composed under pressure is an enormous advantage at exam time. Team sports
also
teach us how to work as a team. Being a ‘team player’ is rated very highly by employers and knowing how to interact and cooperate with others prepares us not only for the workplace but for the rest of our social lives.
To conclude
,
sport
definitely has a place in the school curriculum, because students will become fit and active, improve their attitude to study and learn many important
life
skills. For these reasons, all students who are physically able should be required to participate in physical education
in addition
to their academic subjects.
Submitted by nandnilekhi on

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task achievement
The essay provides a clear stance and comprehensive response to the prompt. To further improve, consider expanding the introduction and giving a brief overview of the main points you'll discuss.
task achievement
Your ideas are clearly presented, but some points could benefit from more development. For example, you could provide a few more specific examples from your own knowledge or experience to illustrate the benefits of physical education.
coherence cohesion
While the essay is well-structured, ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next. Sometimes, connecting phrases at the beginning or end of paragraphs can improve cohesion. For example, consider using phrases like ‘In addition to physical benefits...’ or ‘Moreover, team sports...’ to enhance the flow between paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear and logical structure with a strong introduction and conclusion.
coherence cohesion
The main points are well-supported and consistently tied back to the topic, demonstrating good cohesion throughout the essay.
task achievement
Your essay provides specific and relevant examples that support your argument effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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