IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school, Do the advantages of this outweight disadvantages.

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It is thought that studying foreign languages at elementary
school
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 has more benefits rather than at secondary
school
Use synonyms
.
This
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 essay will discuss both pros and cons of
this
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 phenomenon and provide examples. Personally, I firmly agree with that statement
due to
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 some justifications. On the one hand, there are a lot of positive aspects of starting learning a foreign
language
Use synonyms
 at an early age.
Firstly
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, it is undeniable that toddlers have the ability to absorb information easily.
Therefore
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, they can master the
language
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 basics
while
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 being under 11,
whereas
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 those who learn it later will face challenges related to a lack of experience .
Moreover
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, grasping languages at an early age contributes to
the
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apply
show examples
overall
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 development and can be a head start to future studying.
For instance
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, 7 months after my young sister attended a British
school
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, she started speaking English fluently despite a variety of complicated grammar, which broadened her horizons. On the other side,
this
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 approach might
also
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 have side effects.
Although
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 starting to learn a foreign
language
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 alleviates future problems with understanding, it can put undue pressure on youngsters.
For example
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,
instead
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 of spending time on activities that are essential for children including playing games and other entertainments, they will be obliged to learn additional subjects.
This
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 will not only deprive them of leisure time
,
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apply
show examples
 but
also
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 increase stress and affect mental well-being.
To conclude
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, learning a foreign
language
Use synonyms
 at elementary
school
Use synonyms
 is a valuable method to improve the education system.
However
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, it would be mindful to take into consideration the negative consequences of
this
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 approach.
Although
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 there are harmful effects
such
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 as a lack of leisure time, I believe that the perks outweigh the drawbacks.

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task achievement
While the examples provided are relevant, try to include more specific data or studies to strengthen your argument even further.
coherence cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures a bit more to enhance readability and engagement.
task achievement
You provided a thorough response to the task and covered both advantages and disadvantages clearly.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a logical structure with a clear introduction and conclusion.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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