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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some think college is best for career preparation, while others prefer gaining work experience early. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#think #college #career #preparation #work
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Some believe that higher education is the key/optimal for professional preparation,
while
 others preferably think that exposure to job understanding early is better. In my opinion, I believe that having higher education is essential for academic success,
while
 task judgment could gain soft
skills
.
Initially
, one of the benefits of having a higher education is to obtain in-depth knowledge and hard
skills
 in a chosen field. Gaining knowledge will assist the individual in solving problem-solving questions.
Moreover
, a college degree can open up numerous opportunities and career advancement for graduates to get their desired future jobs.
For example
, big companies
such
 as Apple will aim for fresh graduate students with great thinking ability and a wide understanding of a certain subject which will help to achieve company goals faster.
On the other hand
, having first-hand exposure could acquire leadership
skills
, communication
skills
 and other interpersonal
skills
.
Furthermore
, achieving more connection and insight from the working world would be extremely helpful to get used to the routine of effort and could increase the chance of being a prospective employer. It would improve the individual’s curriculum vitae to be submitted to an occupation. In conclusion,
while
 gaining industry acquaintance first can enhance interpersonal
skills
 and provide valuable insights, obtaining a college degree offers in-depth ability, and problem-solving abilities, and opens doors to numerous career opportunities. Ultimately, a college degree provides a solid foundation for long-term career success and advancement in today’s competitive job market.
Submitted by praveenmodi28596 on

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grammar
Try to improve the grammatical accuracy and sentence structure to enhance the clarity of your ideas. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement and the use of conjunctions.
examples
Provide more relevant and specific examples to support your points. This could help in better illustrating your arguments and making them more compelling.
cohesion
Refine the logical progression of your arguments. Ensure each paragraph flows smoothly to the next, maintaining a clear connection between your ideas.
balance
Your essay provides a balanced discussion of both views, which is important for a good task response.
structure
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in structuring your essay well.
vocabulary
Your essay includes a variety of vocabulary, which demonstrates a good command of the English language.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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